


Blush.

by ghostanimal, ghostgothgeek



Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: Chaos, F/M, Gen, Humor, Multi, no actual penetration, sex ed
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-09
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:26:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 21,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24628531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostanimal/pseuds/ghostanimal, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostgothgeek/pseuds/ghostgothgeek
Summary: It's sexual education day at Casper High, and everyone is giving Danny and Sam a hard time.Co-written with ghostanimal. (Rated M for actual sex ed talk and language.)
Comments: 33
Kudos: 104





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Standard disclaimers, I don't own things. This is my first co-write and my first multi-chapter, so please bear with me. Also thank you to Laz for betaing!

"Why can't I just say I'm sick and avoid this whole thing?" Tucker groaned alongside his friends.

"Because it's mandatory. Do you really want to discuss this one on one with Lancer later?" Danny raised an eyebrow as his friend visibly shuttered.

"No way, man. The topic itself is awkward enough, don't make it worse!"

Sam sighed and readjusted her spider backpack on her shoulders. "There's nothing awkward about it! It's the human body, it's natural. And I'm glad the school is taking a more progressive approach to this. God knows our classmates need it."

The boys looked at her bewildered. There's no way she was looking forward to this.

"How are you so cool about this? Even I have to admit, it's a bit...weird. Especially when Dash and other guys will be in the room too." Danny made a face.

Sam shrugged, "I dunno. I guess I know it all already." Tucker opened his mouth to make a comment. "Not like that! I just….I read." She shrugged again as if it were no big deal.

"Read what exactly?" Danny raised an eyebrow, and Tucker smirked.

"Damn, Sam. I never imagined you'd be an avid porn aficionado." Tucker chuckled as they trudged through the halls of Casper High.

"I'm not!" Sam shrieked. Her parents would just love to hear that rumor floating around school. "I just know a few things, and I'm actually mature about it, unlike some people." She looked pointedly at her friends.

"Hey, we're mature! I just don't exactly want to talk about sex with Dash...that came out wrong." Danny slapped his forehead and dragged his hand down his face.

Sam and Tucker laughed as Danny glanced at the posters hanging on the school walls announcing what day it was: sex education day at Casper High.

It was unavoidable. After a few rumors started spreading about some of the baseball players spreading a little something else to the JV girls' soccer team, Principal Ishiyama ordered a mandatory teaching of safe sex practices to all Casper High students. Abstinence wasn't 100% effective, after all.

"You're both being such babies about this! It'll be fine. A couple hours and it will all be over and we can go home. No big deal." Sam took her usual seat in the back of home room, Danny and Tucker following suit respectively to her left.

"I already had this talk with my dad," Tucker complained. Danny gave a nod.

"Wish I could say the same. It's my dad, so it just kind of went from puberty to about ghosts somehow, and I'm still not really sure how," he complained. He glanced at Sam, who flushed. "You?"

"If you count my mom silently giving me a book and scheduling me an appointment to go on birth control, then yeah," Sam replied. Danny was taken aback by that.

"Wait, you're on birth control?" Danny asked quietly, and Sam flushed a bit darker.

"Not like that!" she insisted. "Periods just really suck, and it helps a lot. With acne too."

Any follow-up questions were cut off by the bell ringing. Mr. Lancer strolled in just as the bell finished, followed by two people, a man and a woman. The man carried two boxes stacked on top of each other, the woman carrying a bag over her shoulder and rolling a crate behind her.

"Alright, alright. Settle down," he said, and the crowd's chatter died down. "This is Mike and Mallory from Planned Parenthood. They're going to talk with you as a group for a bit before we split you up. I expect you all to be mature about this and on your best behavior for our guests." Lancer sat at his desk after finishing his little speech.

Danny scoffed as he saw Lancer pull up Doomed on his computer and quickly hide his screen from being visible to students. "Figures. We get to sit here and suffer while he has fun." Sam rolled her eyes while Tucker started eyeing the woman at the front of the room. The couple that had come in from Planned Parenthood were too attractive to be teaching sex ed to high school kids. Mallory had opened one of the boxes that Mike put on the table set up at the front of the classroom for the purposes of teaching, pulling out a stack of papers.

"So, a little information about Planned Parenthood. Planned Parenthood is a nonprofit organization, and our focus is on sexual and reproductive health. Not only do we provide birth control and condoms, but we also do cancer screenings as well as general checkups and STD testing. We are also a safe space and are trained to work with people of any sexual orientation and gender." Mallory stood cheerfully as she spoke, handing out the packet to students in the front row and asking them to pass the rest to those behind them.

Danny stared at the paper after he got it. It was a small informational packet bound together with a cheap plastic ring system. The Planned Parenthood name was on the first page behind a glossy transparent cover to protect the pages. Inside was a typical Planned Parenthood pamphlet tucked into the pages.

"So, good news!" Mike clasped his hands together. "You don't have to worry about notes. You can simply follow along in these packets. They are yours to keep, you can mark them up however you'd like or refer back to them whenever. This packet will go over a lot more than what we'll be discussing today due to time. What Mallory and I will mainly be covering is sexual health and relationships, but this packet will also cover other things like puberty, gender identity, and it has phone numbers and websites for if you need or want further information.

Sam opened the first page of the book, flipping through the first few pages. She immediately winced at seeing diagrams. Graphic ones with lots of words she didn't recognize based on any of her readings. Wait, what was that-? Oh. She shut the book.

"Let's start with some basic information that's important for all of you to hear," Mallory paused to be sure she had everyone's attention, "Abstinence is of course an option, but teaching that and only that is not effective. First of all, consent is important. Anything other than a clear verbal 'yes' is not consent. Make sure you and your partner are both ready and comfortable before you take steps to further your relationship. And remember, consent goes both ways."

Sam glanced over at Danny, who had begun to thumb through the packet curiously. Tucker kept drumming his fingers on the desk impatiently. Students had to turn in all electronic devices before the seminar started to ensure they would pay attention. Tucker had to turn in all four of his devices (they searched him thoroughly) and was already having withdrawal symptoms.

"When you are both ready to take that step, be sure you are using protection. Even if you are on some form of birth control, it is important to use condoms to protect yourself and your partner from sexually transmitted diseases. Now, the ladies will come with me into the room next door while the guys stay here with Mike." Mallory gestured to the room next door where Ms. Tetslaff was waiting for the girls to file in.

Sam stood and swung her backpack over one shoulder before giving Danny and Tucker a small wave. She smiled as Danny blushed when he came across a rather graphic illustration and closed the pamphlet shut. "Try to actually learn something, guys. Remember, it's just the natural human body."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very short first chapter, but much more to come!


	2. Chapter 2

Danny shot her a weak smile as the girls all stood up and began to file out, the room exploding into light conversation amongst students. Mike and Mallory talked to each other at the front of the room as Mr. Lancer continued to game away. Danny sighed as he leaned back in his seat, staring at the clock. Time was going to move purposefully slow. He just knew it. 

“I don’t need to worry about sex ed,” Dash bragged casually as he leaned back in his chair. Danny rolled his eyes. Of course he only brought this up the second the last girl had left the room. “I already know it all.”

“What, you mean like had sex before?” Tucker questioned, staring at him. Dash scoffed, beginning to tip his chair back on the hind legs.

“Course I have, Foul-ley,” came the light scoff. “I’m the star quarterback. Chicks are crazy for me.” He used a foot to keep his balance as he lightly swayed forward and back in the chair. “I go through condoms like crazy.”

“I dunno, Dash. Find it hard to believe you can so easily find microscopic condoms,” Danny replied boredly. Dash immediately slammed his chair legs on all fours.

“What the fuck did you just say to me, Fentoni!?” he snarled. 

“Nothing,” Danny feigned innocence, holding both hands up. 

He stole a glance at Tucker, who was snickering. Danny’s lips twisted as he tried to hold back a smile. He felt a hand grab his shirt, and he snapped his attention forward. Dash had a grip on his shirt, grasping it tightly as he yanked Danny to him.

“Look, ya pathetic little twink,” he sneered. “Just because-”

“Mr. Baxter, Mr. Fenton,” an annoyed, warning tone seemed to echo throughout the class. Dash immediately let go and darted to slip back in his seat. 

“Mr. Lancer,” Dash tried to begin, “Fenton start-”

“Not today, Mr. Baxter,” the teacher tiredly replied, giving him a stern look from over his computer screen. 

Danny didn’t notice that Mallory had apparently left, and Mike was watching them a bit curiously. As soon as Dash had settled back into his seat, Mike spoke.

“Alright. Now we can get into things. Mild introduction, just so you can know a little itty bit about me. My name is Mike Johnson, you can just call me Mike. I’ve worked at Planned Parenthood as a Practice Nurse for about five years now, and this is my second year coming into schools and teaching sex ed. Mallory actually gave us a great starting point to our first conversation piece. Consent. Now consent’s an incredibly important part of relationships, and it’s a vital part of sex. It needs to be freely given. If you’re with your partner, and you pestered, asked constantly or intimidated them into giving consent, they haven’t given consent.”

Danny began to lean onto his hand, sighing. This was going to be a long class. Mike continued to talk, turning his back to write his points on the board as he spoke. A small piece of folded up paper flew onto Danny’s desk, and he glanced down at it. His name was written on it, and he curiously opened it.

_Your girlfriend consented to all sorts of things with me. :P_

Danny looked up to see Elliot staring at him. The note wasn’t signed, but the stupid “foreign” exchange student’s smug smirk was all the evidence Danny needed. He flipped Elliot off. Elliot made a peace sign and wiggled his tongue before turning his attention back to the teacher. Danny jerked, as if he was going to stand up, only for Tucker to grab his arm and squeeze it. Wasn’t worth it. 

He settled back into his seat, glaring at Elliot as he silently passed the note to Tucker. Tucker’s eyes scanned it, and he saw his friend write on the back of the note. After a moment, Tucker passed it back.

_He’s lying. They kissed ONCE and that’s it. Sam would have told us if they did anything else._

Danny just nodded, but he still exhaled in frustration. He glared at Elliot a bit more before returning his attention to Mike. The man was continuing to write on the board, still talking.

“...People will sometimes just not be in the mood for sex. And it’s not okay to try and persuade them into changing their minds about it. It can be for any number of reasons as to why they don’t want to, and it’s not your job to try and convince them that they do,” Mike continued his talk. 

Danny gasped as he felt his ghost sense going off. Amazing timing, and he groaned a bit to himself as he raised his hand. Mike glanced at him, giving a nod. 

“Can I use the bathroom?” he pleaded. Mike gave a nod, glancing down at a piece of paper.

“Danny, right?” Mike questioned. Danny nodded. “Okay, cool. Yeah, go right ahead. Don’t lollygag.” 

Danny nodded, and he rushed out of the room, skidding into the hallway as he ran down it. It didn’t take long for him to hear the sound of a motorcycle, and he instantly knew that it was Johnny. He glanced around before transforming. He zoomed around the corner, only to nearly smack right into the biker.

Johnny skidded on his bike to stop suddenly, and to Danny’s surprise, he seemed? Happy? To see him? Danny still stayed on high alert. For the most part, Johnny was easy to deal with. He and Danny even struck a small deal, that if Johnny stayed out of trouble, he and Kitty could go to Amity Park whenever and hang out. For them, or rather Johnny by himself, to appear at Casper High, alone, was a sign that he was definitely looking for trouble. 

“Hey, kid! Been looking for ya.”

“Eager to get your butt kicked, huh?” Danny smirked. He began to crack his knuckles, already imagining how nice it was gonna be to just take out all the cringe-induced stress of sex ed out on Johnny.

“Nah, man,” Johnny shook his head. Instead of attacking, or doing anything even threatening, Johnny learned forward on his handles. “Kitty and I heard about what’s going on today. So she wanted to come and talk to your girlfriend about it, and I figured I could take that chance to give you some advice too, bro to bro.”

...What the fuck?

Danny immediately rubbed his face with his hand. What the fuck was this, what the fuck was even his life right now. There was so much to unpack in just that one sentence.

“Okay um….” His voice was suddenly exhausted. “Firstly, I don’t have a girlfriend.”

“You and the spooky chick broke up?” Johnny asked. Danny was surprised by the seemingly legitimate concern in his voice. “Dude, you guys were great together, what happened?”

“We were never together!” Danny snapped. Johnny stared at him curiously. “We’re just best friends.”

“So you typically just make out with your best friends at the beach?” he asked. Danny’s cheeks burned.

“You saw that!? What the hell, how come my ghost sense didn’t go off? Where were you guys?” Danny demanded to know.

“Kitty and I were playing volleyball with some friends. Guess you were too busy making out with your best friend to notice.”

Why did he wake up and get out of bed this morning? Danny needed to see if Clockwork would let him go back in time and kick his own ass. 

“Okay, fine. So what’s it going to take to make you take Kitty and just hit the road?” Danny demanded to know. Johnny paused before shrugging.

“I dunno man, do you like, have any questions?” he asked. Johnny reached into his pocket for a phone. “Or like, I can show you a picture or something of how it works-”

“Absolutely not, put the phone away or I’ll destroy it,” Danny immediately threatened. The last thing he wanted was to either see his ghostly enemies naked, or basically look at porn with them.

“Oh, that’s a good starting point,” Johnny visibly lightened up. Oh no. “So sometimes it’s fun to watch porn with your partner.”

“No, that wouldn’t really work, Sam reads porn,” Danny’s mind flashed back to earlier as he spoke without thinking. 

“Then read it to her, man,” Johnny encouraged. 

“What the fuck, no, we’re not-no!” Danny scowled. 

“Eh, fair.” Johnny scratched his chin as he thought. “Well, nothing gets a girl hornier than wooing her. Romancing her. Get her flowers or something, listen sometimes, and she’ll be down to fuck at a moment’s notice.”

“But like, well...I mean, like, what if _I_...can’t, ya know?” Danny gestured his hands wildly, cheeks a dark green as he refused to say the actual word. “Rise to the occasion.”

“You’re like, what? Eighteen? Trust me, you’re not gonna have that problem,” Johnny snorted in amusement. Danny glared.

“Anxiety’s a bitch, man. Especially when I’m tired as hell from chasing you fuckers around,” Danny complained with a huff. “How many times will I have to put getting laid on hold because one of you dingdongs decided that you wanna cause havoc at the mall?”

“Just put a sock on the ghost portal or something?” Johnny shrugged.

“Excellent, I’ll find the world’s biggest sock and put it to where the entire fucking Ghost Zone, and as a bonus, my parents, will know that I’m trying to have some alone time,” Danny snapped sarcastically. “Can you just go? I won’t kick your ass if you and Kitty just leave.”

“Yeah, yeah, hall monitor,” Johnny rolled his eyes as he revved his bike up. “I’ll go get Kitty, and we’ll bounce when she’s done. You know girls, they can talk forever.”

Danny rolled his eyes, shooing Johnny away. Johnny saluted him with two fingers before zooming off down the hall. 

A glance around told him that he was safe for now, and he turned human before making a return to his class. He opened the door and slipped inside as quietly as he could. Mike nodded to acknowledge his return, but continued lecturing.

_Johnny,_ Danny mouthed to Tucker as he raised an eyebrow curiously. He nodded. 

“And so, now, we’re gonna take a look at some.” 

Mike held up a bulk pack of condoms. He opened the packaging, and he continued to talk as he traversed the room, dumping a small handful of condoms on each desk as he passed them out. 

“The birth control that most men typically interact with and deal with are condoms. Condoms are basically pouches that cover your penis during sex, and how they work is that they prevent vaginal fluids from contacting semen, which prevents pregnancy and many STDs. And this is true of oral sex, vaginal and anal, so it’s very useful for various sexual practices. As of now, it’s the only type of birth control that also prevents STDs, and it helps work alongside birth control in preventing pregnancy.”

Danny shifted a bit uncomfortably as he looked at the small pile of condoms that had been dumped on his desk. They were brightly colored packaging in a small plastic wrapping, and he hesitantly picked one up.

“Condoms come in many box sizes. Boxes of three tend to be about $2, normally about $15 if you buy in bulk. They’re sold basically everywhere. Drug stores, grocery stories, online, vending machines,” he listed off places. “Planned Parenthood and some community health centers and doctor’s offices will actually give away condoms for free. At our building, you can just go in and get some. But if you go to the store, there’s no ID carding or a prescription needed. They’re normally in the family planning area or the pharmacy part of a store. There’s absolutely no need to be embarrassed or anything about getting them. You’re being very responsible and respectful of yourself and your partner by making sure you’re both protected from pregnancy and STDs.”

Danny glanced to the side of him as Mike continued to pass out condoms.. Tucker had opened one of the condoms and was holding it in his hands, making a small face as he examined it. He hesitantly stuck his tongue out and pressed it to the condom.

“Ew, it’s greasy,” he complained lightly. Danny didn’t comment, simply snorting in amusement as Tucker began to blow air into the condom like a balloon. The tech geek slowly inflated the latex before he finally stopped. Tucker snickered as he saw the end result, tying off the end. He immediately turned to poke Danny with it. Danny snatched it out of his hand, lightly tossing it off to the side. It bounced off the back of a chair before falling to the floor. 

“This is why you don’t need to worry about the free condoms they’ll probably be giving us,” he lightly teased him. Tucker laughed. 

“That’s gay,” Dash’s voice whispered at him. He ignored it. 

“What size do you get?” one of the students questioned aloud. 

“Good question. Condoms are very stretchy, so most fit into a standard size just fine. But if you feel it’s too tight or that it tends to slip off easily, try going for a larger or smaller size,” Mike explained. He had finished passing out condoms before returning to the table at the front. 

“So, now that we know a little bit about condoms, we’re going to do some basic practice with them. Condoms are really effective against pregnancy if used properly. Of course, people make mistakes, but knowing how condoms work and how to use them will help improve how effective they are,” Mike continued. He began to open the second box on the table, and he pulled out a bundle of bananas. He broke one off from the bunch, and he began to travel up and down the rows, passing one out to each student.

“This is stupid,” Dash complained lightly. Danny glanced over at him as he was complaining to his friend. “Paulina’s on the pill, I don’t need this. We can like, just do it whenever, and it’s not gonna matter.” 

“Yeah but you and Paulina might break up,” Kwan told him with a shrug. “It’s high school dude, and there’s lots of hotties in college.”

“Yeah true, I was going to dump her anyway if we were still together before college,” Dash shrugged.

Man, if Sam were here, she’d tear Dash to pieces over those comments. And Sam didn’t even really care that much for Paulina. Danny sighed lightly. What was Sam having to suffer through right now? It couldn’t be as bad as listening to these idiots. 

“Now,” Mike began, holding up his banana in one hand, condom in the other as he reached the front of the classroom once more. “Does everybody have a banana and a condom?” His eyes scanned the room, and he fell upon Danny. He stared at him. “Uh, Danny?”

Danny nodded back at him as he swallowed his bite. The halfa had peeled the banana and had easily eaten half of it by now. 

“Hm?” he asked, mouth half-full. Mike’s mouth twitched in an amused smile.

“We’re not eating the bananas, dude,” he lightly teased. He reached into the box to pull out another. It clearly was not the first time somebody did this. Danny raised an eyebrow before his cheeks flushed. Oh. Mike came back to him with another banana, handing it to him. “Did anybody else decide to have breakfast?” the teacher questioned. Danny’s cheeks flushed harder when nobody else spoke up. “Excellent!” 

“Ya know, Fenton,” Dash’s voice whispered loudly to him, but just low enough that Mike didn’t seem to acknowledge it. Danny’s eyes lazily drifted over to him. “It was pretty gay how you just swallowed so much of that banana.”

“You’d know from personal experience, aye?” Danny muttered back. Dash’s fists clenched tightly.

“I’m not gay, you fucking idiot,” he hissed. 

“I dunno, I heard football can get pretty gay,” Tucker added on. Dash glared. 

“You two are probably the gay ones. Aren’t you two always sneaking around together?” Dash questioned, and he leaned back in his seat so that he could better whisper to him. Danny’s eyes darted to Mike in hopes that he’d notice Dash talking and tell him to shut it for now, but he had become preoccupied with answering a question somebody had brought up. 

“Nah, that’s him and Manson,” Kwan pointed out. He shifted his seat to join in on the conversation. “Have you seen the stuff Fenton keeps in his locker? He and Manson probably get like, super freaky. There’s always all these like ropes and gadgets in there.” 

Danny stared at him with a blank expression, his mind trying to race and figure out what the hell Kwan was referring to. Oh. The Fenton Fisher line. The Jack-o-nine tails. Specter Deflector. Why were so many of his parents' stuff unintentionally weird-looking? He’d never be able to look at any of them the same way again. 

“Yeah, Manson’s probably very freaky. Just like, look at her and tell me she hasn’t done some weird shit,” Dash agreed, and Danny glared at them.

“Dude,” Tucker lightly gasped, and he sounded disgusted. Danny was too. “Sam’s our friend.” 

“Don’t talk about her like that,” Danny chimed in, giving them a Look. He wished he could throw his packet or something at Dash without Lancer or Mike noticing. 

“Or what?” Dash questioned. Danny was cut off from delivering a threat by Mike addressing the class. 

“Alright, so we’re going to walk through together how to put a condom on using the bananas,” Mike spoke. “Firstly, we’re going to check our condoms. They have a long shelf life, but they do expire. So check the expiration date. Also check to make sure the packaging isn’t damaged or has any holes in it.” As he spoke, Mike exaggerated checking the condom. “Cool, it’s good, so let’s open it.”

Danny glanced over at Tucker. His friend had eagerly ripped open a second condom and had completely unrolled it. He stretched it out, holding it close to his face as he examined it. His fingers slipped, and the condom smacked him in the face as it snapped out of his grasp. He yelped in surprise, immediately putting his newly free hand to his face.

“Aw, gross, my face is covered in grease!” he half-yelled. A small wave of snickers and laughs. Mike himself was biting his lip to prevent bursting into laughter himself.

“It’s not grease, just lube,” Mike explained. “Most condoms come pre-lubed to make it easier to put on. Why don’t you go wash it off in the bathroom?”

Tucker’s cheeks flushed dark red as he stood up to exit the room. Danny sighed lightly, but he couldn’t help but snort in amusement. He shifted uncomfortably, now without the comfort of his best friend amongst the others. Geez, is this what Tucker had to go through with his dad earlier? Well, least Tucker didn’t have to sit through Johnny’s weird talk.

Danny stared up at Mike as the man talked, instantly zoning out. This was so boring. When was lunch? It had to be soon, right? Ah fuck, it’s nowhere near lunch...That banana was delicious, but not all that filling. Could he eat the new one? Or would that get him in trouble? Wait, if he put the condom on and took it off, could he eat it then? They didn’t just throw them out, right? That’d be such a waste, and yeah, Tucker said they were kinda greasy, but so was the cafeteria food, and Danny still ate that. Hmm, Mike seemed chill but-

A white slip of paper slid near him, and he glanced at it. It was a note, and he stared at the kid who passed it. He was already looking straight ahead at Mike. The paper had his name on it, and he unfolded it.

_Tip for you: Sam likes the grape and strawberry flavored condoms._

His eyes darted up to watch Elliot, who was in turn watching him read. Danny felt anger bubbling, and he resisted the urge to burn the note with ecto-energy, settling for simply crumbling it up into a ball instead. Elliot smirked at him, giving a wave. Danny glanced at Mike. He was distracted. Danny stood and chucked the wadded note at Elliot, hitting him square in the nose before quickly sitting back down. Elliot frowned at him, sticking his middle finger up at him. Danny returned it.

“You okay?” 

Danny jumped as Tucker slipped back into his seat. He exhaled heavily, scratching the back of his head as he just shook it. Now wasn’t a good time to talk about it. 

“He’s just mad about not getting any,” Dash spoke up. God, why was Dash so interested in him today? “Ever since this whole thing, Paulina’s been leaving me hanging. The goth chick’s probably doing the same.”

“I don’t have a girlfriend!” Danny argued, his voice pitching in a panicked annoyance at the implication. Dash rolled his eyes.

“You idiot, you don’t have to have to be boyfriend-girlfriend to be getting some,” Dash sneered. 

“Aren’t you allowed to have guy-girl sleepovers with Sam?” Nathan’s voice spoke up. Danny grinded his teeth in annoyance as he glared at the guy just barely within earshot of their conversation. Not. Helping.

“Whoa, really? My mom would never go for that,” Kwan complained. 

“Damn, Fenton, is that true?” Dash asked.

“Y-yeah, but it’s not like it’s just Sam and I, Tucker’s always there,” Danny said. He could feel his cheeks growing darker and darker. 

“Ah yeah, Foley’s kind of a buzzkill,” Dash nodded understandingly, Kwan mirroring it. 

“Tucker’s not a buzzkill, he’s our best friend!” Danny argued.

“I mean, he’s pretty pervy, maybe he just watches?” Kwan suggested. 

“Hey!” Tucker finally spoke up, giving a glare. He then unintentionally let out a sly smirk towards Danny. “But uh, ya know. Not sure what he gets up to when I’m sleeping.”

“Tucker!” Danny hissed in horror. That fucking traitor! Tucker gave a light snicker. “You know we’re just friends, you asshole!”

“Friends don’t make out with each other,” Tucker pointed out. Danny heard Dash’s chair scooting towards them in order to listen in. He ignored the jock, glaring at Tucker.

“It was only like six times.”

“Six!?” Tucker stared at him, jaw agape. Danny did the mental math, and froze. 

“Five,” he corrected himself.

“That’s still three more times that I don’t know about!” Tucker exclaimed. 

“What are you two _doing,_ Fenton?” Dash asked him.

“Fuck off!” Danny hissed. 

“He just can’t resist,” Elliot’s voice teased. Danny did a double take at seeing Elliot sitting closer to them. When did he move? Obviously when Mike wasn’t looking. He now sat within hearing distance of everything. “I mean, Sam’s an awesome kisser.”

“Eh, she was kinda shitty,” Dash shrugged. Danny felt an emotional whiplash. What? Oh. Right. Ember’s concert. That felt like ages ago. Wait, was that even supposed to count? That didn’t count, right? 

“We kissed before, she wasn’t bad,” Tucker tried to argue. What!? Danny felt that ping of immediate jealousy. When the hell did Tucker? Oh, nevermind. That flour sack thing. He remembered now. Tucker had told him about that. Something about a bro code. Danny didn’t really get it at the time, but he always respected the honesty. 

Elliot let out a low whistle.

“Sam’s quite adventurous,” he commented. Danny shot him a Look.

“Shut up, fakie,” he scowled. Elliot returned the nasty look before turning frontwards in his seat. 

“Lemme guess, you kissed her too?” Danny bitterly asked Kwan. He shook his head.

“No, we’re just best friends,” Kwan explained. He grinned. “We go to that poetry slam thing. I’ve actually never done better in English.”

Just best friends. Wasn’t that what Danny was with Sam? Then again, best friends don’t really cuddle up on the couch when their other best friend is tutoring, and that cuddle session turns into light kissing until one of the best friend’s parents catch them and kick you out. That wasn’t really something he ever did with Tucker. Or even wanted to or thought about. What was it then? They never really talked about it. Just about how much it sucked that he wasn’t allowed back in the Manson house for a month because of the whole thing. Her mom’s footsteps were like a damn ninja’s. He still wasn’t convinced she didn’t float or randomly teleported there. She was normally so loud in announcing her presence. 

“Wait, so if you guys have both kissed Sam, does that mean you guys kiss too?” Kwan’s question snapped Danny out of his thoughts.

“No!” Danny immediately half-yelled. Mike looked up from the front of the room, staring at the group.

“Is there a problem?” he asked. Danny sunk in his chair.

“No,” he replied. Mike stared for a moment before shrugging it off, and he continued his lecture. 

“I’m not bi,” Tucker whispered at the two jocks. “I like girls only, so don’t tell people that stuff. It’s hard enough to find a date.”

“Dude you guys are always doing gay things together,” Dash replied.

“Like fucking what? We don’t go running around naked together slapping each other’s butts like football,” Danny snapped. 

“I can’t even begin to count the number of times we caught you twinks in a literal closet together,” Dash snorted.

“You know what a twink is, Dash?” Elliot spoke up, raising an eyebrow. For the first time all day, Dash looked genuinely taken aback and unsure of how to even respond. “Sounds like you’re the actual gay one here. Must be from sniffing all those jock straps.”

“Listen, you fake European-wannabe,” Dash growled, but he was cut off unintentionally by Mike.

“So, is anybody having any trouble? Having any questions?” Mike wondered. 

A gasp, and light blue smoke. Danny tensed up, and he shot his hand up. 

“Mike, can I use the restroom?” he half-yelled before the teacher could even call on him. The Planned Parenthood rep stared at him a bit before giving a light nod. 

“Jeez, Fenton, you sure need to pee all the time,” Dash commented. Danny glared at him as he snapped to his feet, rushing towards the door, only for Mike’s hand to reach on him.

“Danny, this is the second time you’ve gone to the bathroom in the past two hours,” he whispered to him. Danny flinched in worry. “Are things okay?” 

“I’m f-fine,” Danny said quickly, and Mike removed his hand. “I just really have to pee, small bladder.”

“I’ve seen this before,” Mike’s voice lowered a bit to prevent the other students from listening in. “This isn’t my first class, and I know that it’s a sensitive topic, so if you want to take a break and have a more one on one lesson later, please reach out.”

Danny flushed dark red, and he simply nodded.

“Y-yeah, yeah,” Danny said, brushing him off a bit as he quickly opened the door and rushed out. 

He scrambled out of the room and down the hall, straight into the boys’ room. The swinging door barely closed fully before a flash of light overwhelmed the bathroom, and Phantom came flying out soon after. He flew down the hallway, scanning for any signs of ghosts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was written by ghostanimal. Next chapter starts Sam's experience. Let us know what you think or what you want to see coming up!


	3. Chapter 3

Sam slowly walked over into the next room, saying hello to Mallory, who she already knew from her visits at the clinic, on the way to a seat in the back. Their class wasn’t huge, so it took only a minute or two to gather all the girls in one room. Ms. Tetslaff took note of who was in attendance before pulling out a newspaper and flipping to a crossword puzzle. Apparently, it was awkward for the teachers to be in the same room as the students as well. 

Mallory shut the door and took a seat on a stool in the front of the room. “First things first, this is a safe space. What happens in this room stays in this room. No question is a dumb question. We are going to be open with each other and respect each other.” She smiled and glanced around the room. “I see some familiar faces, but for those who don’t know me, my name is Mallory and I’m a nurse practitioner at Planned Parenthood. Feel free to reach out to me personally for any questions and resources you may need. Again, this is a judgement-free zone. Let’s jump right into it. By a show of hands, how many of you have heard about birth control or are on it already?” 

Sam looked around the room, seeing most hands go up, and raised hers as well. 

“Excellent. Now, birth control can come in many forms, including an IUD, an implant, a shot, and most commonly, pill form. Obviously the name states that it can be used to prevent pregnancy, but it can also be used to help with period symptoms if yours gets too unbearable that you can’t continue on with your normal daily activities. It can help control your acne, and can help regulate your cycle. If you are interested in learning more about this and how it pertains to you, I recommend making an appointment using the website or phone number on the back of my card there. Are there any questions thus far?” 

The girls all shook their heads and remained awkwardly silent. 

“Alright well, with all these hormone changes, you’ll begin to see more physical and emotional effects on your body. You’ll also likely develop more sexual urges and thoughts as well. You may find yourself sexually attracted to the opposite sex, the same sex, both, or none of these. Each sexual orientation is valid, and I would love to cover more of them in this short amount of time, but I was given specifics from your principal due to recent events.”

A couple of girls sunk down in their seats in embarrassment, while some others (Paulina, particularly) smirked and took note of exactly which girls she now had blackmail on. 

“I want to mention that regardless of how you identify, it is still important to use protection during sex of any kind. Even if you are in a situation where you can’t get pregnant, it is important to protect yourself and your partner from STDs as well. I’m sure most if not all of you are sexually active, so let’s talk about that. I’ll grab some things from my bag and we will go over them, but feel free to talk amongst yourselves while I set up.” 

Mallory started pulling things out of her bag while the girls remained fairly quiet at first. A few shifted in their seats or coughed, but Paulina was the first to break the silence, a small smirk forming on her face as she decided to torment her favorite victim.

“Well, we all know Sam gets plenty of extracurricular physical activity with Danny.” Several girls giggled at Paulina’s comment. 

“W-what do you mean?” Sam looked around the room nervously, avoiding everyone’s eyes. There was no way Paulina knew Sam was helping Danny Phantom fight ghosts. Did Paulina somehow make the connection between Fenton and Phantom? 

“You know what I mean. Is he good?” Paulina rested her chin on her hand and waited for Sam to answer.

“Well, yeah. He’s great. I can’t see anyone else doing what he’s doing.” Sam remained skeptical as to why Paulina suddenly decided to grow a brain and uncover Danny’s secret. 

“Really? I would think he’s pretty small…” Paulina loved to see the goth girl squirm. 

“He’s not! He’s been growing a lot lately and gets better every day.” Sam crossed her arms over her chest as she defended her friend. Danny has put on a lot of muscle since the accident!

Paulina raised her eyebrows as a few girls started to whisper. “Interesting. Are you guys adventurous?” 

“We...kinda have to be?” Danny was going to flip once he heard Paulina and now some of the other girls in the classroom knew he’s half ghost.

“That must be exhausting, trying new things all the time. But it’s also gotta be really rewarding as well,” Star chimed in with a wink. 

Valerie let out a small chuckle from next to her. She knew Sam was obviously misinterpreting what Paulina was implying, especially because she knew both girls rather well. Sam would not be that open with her enemy, or anyone for that matter, about her sex life with Danny. Valerie was pretty sure Sam was thinking about ghost fighting. It’s only been a few months since Valerie knew about Danny’s secret identity, which she intended to keep secret because Danny was actually a nice guy. She’s fought alongside them a few times and actually considered them friendly acquaintances, but for all the trouble the goth had given her over the years, particularly when she was interested in Danny too, she decided to let Paulina tease Sam for a bit. 

Paulina, although she had experimented, hadn’t actually _done_ anything, despite what most people thought. But Valerie knew she always grilled everyone for information on sex, both for her own learning and perhaps leverage if she ever needed it. Paulina actually had quite a perverted brain, probably a side effect from all the time she spent with Dash and Kwan. Valerie also knew Paulina would never pass up the opportunity to embarrass Sam Manson. 

Meanwhile, Star would just do whatever Paulina told her to do or whatever she thought Paulina would be most pleased with. Plus, Star actually held all the secrets to Casper High. She was very observant and a keen listener. For some reason, everyone trusted her with their secrets. She was easily the Gretchen Wieners of Amity Park. 

“Ever do it in public?” Valerie bluntly asked, a small smirk on her face. Paulina seemed pleased her former friend was joining in on bombarding the goth girl. 

“Uh, I mean usually it’s in a public place, I guess. We can’t really control that, though.” Sam pressed her lips together and hoped all the attention she was getting would be ending very, very soon. She’d have to do damage control, that’s for sure. She’d have to make every girl in the room swear they’d never tell Danny’s secret, or she’d have to kill them. Most people were already afraid of her anyways, adding death threats she would never actually carry out wouldn’t be a huge surprise. 

Paulina’s jaw dropped slightly. “Wow. I have to give you losers more credit. I never thought you’d have the guts to actually do anything.” 

Sam scoffed at her. “We’re perfectly capable of handling ourselves.” 

“Clearly,” Star started, “I’m so telling Uncle Jeremy about this.” She whispered the second part to Sam. Only Paulina knew that Star and Sam were actually cousins. She’d keep that secret until her death bed for the sake of her best friend’s reputation. 

“You tell my dad, I tell everyone we’re cousins.” Sam narrowed her eyes at the girl.

“One is the truth and one is a lie. Which one is more believable?” Star crossed her arms defiantly. She sure lived up to the reputation she built herself. “You’re with Danny all the time.”

“Then I’ll tell everyone who your secret crush is. Both of them.” Sam smirked at her cousin’s shocked face. Most people knew Star liked Kwan, but she wasn’t fully out as bi just yet. 

“How di-”

“Like that’s a giant leap? Please, it’s obvious.” Her eyes quickly flashed to the Latina girl next to Star, then back to the blonde. “You can’t tell anyone about Danny.” Sam warned sternly. 

“Ooh, so this is secret information?” Paulina smiled, suddenly interested in the conversation again. She loved secrets. 

“Of course it’s secret information! Why would he ever want this getting out? His parents would kill him!” 

“Well, for one he’d be quite a hero,” Paulina pointed out.

“He already is a hero.” 

“If you say so, freak. So, is it actually romantic? Does it hurt?” Paulina took mental notes. 

“I mean, sometimes we get hurt, but it’s nothing we can’t deal with. Especially when Tucker is there to help too. As for romantic, I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Sam was beginning to think Paulina was batshit crazy.

“Oh, so it’s a friends with benefits kinda deal then?” Ashley, a girl from their class suddenly piped in. Sam had never spoken to the girl in her life, and now she and almost half of their class found Sam quite interesting. If only they invested their time into actual causes that matter rather than gossip...

“Must be,” Star said. “No wonder your parents don’t like Danny.” She giggled. 

“Friends with what?” Sam looked at the girls confused for a brief moment before she remembered what they were learning about today: sexual education. The girls were talking about sex the whole time. In particular, sex with Danny. 

Sam’s eyes widened as her face heated up, turning a bright crimson. “N-no, uh, it’s not...I mean we never, we aren’t doing...he’s my f-friend…” She couldn’t stop stammering; she had never been more mortified in her entire life. 

“Uh huh, sounds _really_ convincing.” Paulina smirked. 

“Yeah, freaky girl likes to get freaky, no big deal.” Star shrugged nonchalantly. 

Sam wished she had Danny’s power of invisibility right now. _Stop thinking about Danny in sex ed_. “We….we aren’t a couple, we’re not dating, we are not together.” She felt like she was sitting under a microscope. She looked up at Mallory, who was still writing things on the board and paying absolutely no attention to the girls gossiping in the back. 

“You can keep telling yourself that, but there’s always been something more between you guys. Trust me, we’ve all seen it,” Valerie said as all the girls nodded.

Why was everyone suddenly so interested in Sam and her sex life? Or rather, lack thereof. Sam preferred being ignored over this. “N-no, we aren’t….having... _sex_ …” It was so hard just for her to get the words out. 

“But you’d like to. Someday. I mean, we all know you like him...like, like him like him.” Valerie raised an eyebrow at the goth. “Maybe even then some.” Valerie and Sam had some silent understanding, though they never actually had the conversation, that Valerie backed off of Danny for more than just ghost fighting reasons. “It’s normal to want to sleep with the guy you like.”

“I don’t-” Sam stopped as Valerie held her hand up for her to stop talking.

“Don’t try to deny it. I saw you guys making out in the bushes freshman year.” Valerie’s comment earned a lot of chatter amongst the girls. Lots of “I knew it”s and “no wonder”s and “I told you so”s filled the room. 

“Give us details!” Mia, another girl Sam had never spoken to, screeched, all girls drawing their undivided attention towards Sam. 

“Oh my God.” Sam face palmed and dragged her hand down her face. “Kill me. Kill me now.” 

“Alright, ladies!” Mallory clapped her hands to get their attention. Sam silently thanked all of the possible higher powers for the save. “I already mentioned birth control. However, the best way to prevent getting an STD is to use condoms.” She held one up high in the air. “They look like this, and come in various sizes. Please do not feel embarrassed to buy them for your partner, and remember to check for the expiration date and any signs of damage.” She unwrapped it and stretched it gently for a demonstration. “It’s always better to be over prepared and to protect both yourself and your partner. Now, we are going to practice putting one on.” 

Mallory picked up the crate from the floor and set it on a chair, pulling out a bunch of bananas and snapping one off. “So, if this is the penis, you start by rolling the condom on like so. I’m going to pass out some supplies and you are all going to do what I just demonstrated. Please pass back a banana and a few condoms to your fellow classmates.” She gave everyone in the front row a bunch of bananas followed by a large handful of condoms. 

With Mallory temporarily distracted, Paulina decided to keep pressing for information. “So he gave you earrings, picked you to win the pageant, you spend more time at his house than your own, and you’ve been caught rolling around in the bushes at least once. You’re really trying to tell us there’s nothing going on between you and Danny Fenton?” 

Sam groaned. “Not that it’s any of your business, but no. I’m not dating anyone, especially not Danny.” She grabbed her supplies from the girl in front of her. 

“Well you got pretty cozy pretty fast with Elliot not too long ago.” 

Sam narrowed her eyes at Ashley. “Wow, and people say you never pay attention in school.” She finished off her sarcastic remark with a signature eye roll.

“That’s right! You were all lovey dovey goth freaks until Danny broke you up!” Star perked up at her sudden recall of information. 

“That’s not at all what happened. Now, can we please stop talking about me and Danny and how we aren’t dating?” 

“You can still sleep with him without dating him. That’s what friends with benefits means,” Paulina pointed out.

Sam pinched the bridge of her nose, growing to a surprisingly new level of annoyance she never thought was possible. “Danny and I are just friends. Best friends. That’s it. We aren’t dating, and we definitely aren’t having sex. Zero. Zip. Nada. Zilch. None.” She sighed in relief as there was no immediate response. Perhaps this time she was stern enough and they would leave her alone.

Then, after a moment…

“Even if she _says_ they’re not sleeping together doesn’t mean they aren’t doing stuff.” Sam wanted to scream. “They’re always sneaking around and trying to get away from other people. Plus she has DSL.” Paulina examined her manicure. 

“DSL?” Some girl, Hannah may have been her name, asked. 

“Dick sucking lips. That purple lipstick must go places.” 

“Alright, that’s enough. Let the girl breathe.” Valerie stepped in. It had gone too far. She looked over at Sam and mouthed an apology. Sam forced a small smile and mouthed a thank you. Valerie meant well, really. And she was generally pretty cool. At a certain time, the topic of Danny made things harder between the girls, though they had mainly moved past that at this point. The girls were fairly friendly now that Valerie wasn’t wanting to kill Danny Phantom anymore. 

Paulina smirked and opened her mouth to torment her victim more, but the instructor had finally spoken up again. 

“Alright, each of you should have been supplied a banana? Good, now you’re all going to take the condom, unwrap it, and roll it onto the banana.” Mallory gave another demonstration, covering the fruit in a colorful green rubber this time.

Sam wasn’t paying attention. She couldn’t pay attention. She didn’t give a fuck what people thought. But this also involved Danny. She could feel a light blush hit her cheeks just thinking about him. She couldn’t drag Danny into this. Plus, why would he even want a rumor going around that they were sleeping together? He didn’t like her that way. He definitely didn’t think she was attractive enough for... _that_. He pined after other girls all the time. And they’re only 18! Well, she and Tucker were 18. Danny still had a few weeks before his 18th birthday at the beginning of April. But either way, that’s way too young to be hav-

“Sam, I know you already know this stuff, but please set an example for the other girls.” 

Sam looked up at Mallory like a deer in headlights. She just noticed she had peeled her banana and started eating it in the middle of her whirling thoughts. She stopped chewing and looked down at her banana, which was a quarter of the way gone already, then at all the girls who were trying to roll the colorful rubbers onto their own bananas.

Sam mentally slapped herself. She was totally calm earlier this morning. Like she had told Tucker, it’s just the human body, it’s natural. But ever since Paulina had made that first implication of Sam sleeping with Danny, she was frazzled. She couldn’t stop imagining what it would actually be like if they were to ever date...

Mallory sat another banana on Sam’s desk and gave her a soft smile. Sam grimaced after Mallory turned and walked back to the front of the room and stared down at it. _Ugh_. Why does it have to be a banana? She would never be able to eat one now without thinking about dicks. They’re probably not shaped and sized like this anyways. Sam couldn’t imagine any guy in school having a dick the size of a banana in their pants. Surely that would be noticeable? 

She glanced down at the banana again as she slouched in her seat and rolled the condom onto it. 

How would something as big as a banana fit up _there_ anyways?! She knew from her research (fanfiction and romance novels) that girls preferred guys to be bigger...down there. Plus, guys seemed to compare or mention sizes all the time. 

Sam looked at her banana with the purple condom rolled onto it. Was Danny that big? 

_WOAH. Nope. Abort mission!_ Don’t _go there, Manson_. 

She felt her face heating up again. She hoped Danny and Tucker were having an easier time than she was. _Stop thinking about Danny in sex ed!_

Valerie glanced over at the goth again, noticing her red face. “Hey, I’m sorry if I egged them on too much about the making out in a bush comment,” she whispered. 

Sam shot her a small smile. “It’s okay, it’s not your fault. It’s only happened a small handful of times.” 

Valerie raised her eyebrow and moved closer to Sam. “Spill,” she pursed her lips, “if you want to, that is.” 

Sam took a deep breath and smiled at Valerie’s level of respect. She was definitely getting closer to Valerie more recently, and it was a nice break from all the testosterone every once in a while. She could even start seeing Valerie as a best friend, one she could talk to about boys and period problems. But that required effort. 

“Okay umm…” She saw Valerie’s eyes light up when she realized Sam was actually going to talk to her. It was actually kind of a nice feeling to finally talk to someone about this. Plus, she could trust Valerie. If Valerie could be trusted with Danny’s secret, Sam felt she could trust her with just about anything (except her family’s wealth; she didn’t need to reopen old wounds for her new friend). Sam gave a genuine smile, feeling a little excited to be able to finally gush about this. “Well, you mentioned the first time it happened. In the bushes. But it doesn’t totally count because it was a fakeout makeout and we were trying to distract you from discovering Danny’s secret,” she said quietly. 

Valerie nodded eagerly and motioned for Sam to continue. 

“There’s been a couple of fakeout makeouts since then. So it’s really not a big deal, but it is really nice kissing him. I don’t know how he feels though.”

Valerie chuckled, “Girl, I saw his face after you kissed him. He definitely liked it. Oh and, uh, sorry for calling you guys losers. You’re actually some of the most genuine people I’ve ever met.” 

“We’re past that, Val. All is forgiven.” Sam opened another condom and rolled it around in her hands, giving them something to do. She wants to be friends with Valerie, but she was still nervous. Gushing about boys certainly wasn’t very goth of her, but she really appreciated the bond she saw many women having with each other. So she wanted that too. Sue her. 

“So have there been any times where he’s kissed you for real?” Valerie set her three colorfully wrapped bananas on her desk, giving Sam her full attention. 

“Um. I’m not really sure. Kinda once. And uh...he may be banned from my house right now because my mom caught us lightly making out…” Sam twirled her hair around her finger as Valerie let out a laugh. 

“No way! Really?!” 

Sam laughed also, “Yeah, it was pretty embarrassing. I don’t know what would have happened if my mom hadn’t walked in, if we would have gotten together or not, but yeah. If I ever bring up Danny in a conversation, my parents get all frazzled and my dad leaves the room. It’s actually been really fun to mess with them.” Sam grinned. 

“Wait, your mom walked in on you and Danny having sex?!” Paulina said a little too loudly, earning a few heads turning in their direction. Paulina reached into her backpack and dug around for a bit. What the heck was she doing anyway?

“No!! That’s not at all what happened!” 

Valerie chuckled again, “well, you know I-” Her watch suddenly beeped. “Ghost,” she mouthed to Sam, who nodded and looked around as well. She spotted Kitty ducking her head back in through the wall. 

Before Valerie could jump into action, Sam grabbed her arm. “Don’t worry, I got it. And thanks.” 

Quickly rising from her seat and ignoring all the eyes on her, she mentioned to the instructor she needed to use the restroom and walked out of the classroom before anyone could stop her, sneaking a thermos out with her. Once the classroom door was closed and she was in the hallway, she started walking around.

“Kitty?” Sam whispered, jumping a bit when said ghost suddenly popped up in front of her. “What are you doing here?” Sam hissed. 

Kitty shrugged. “Johnny and I were riding by and saw the guys and girls all split up and got curious. By the way, if you ever need some alone time with Danny, just let us know. We can try to keep other ghosts away for twenty minutes or so.” She winked at Sam.

“What?! How did you hear about that?!” 

“Good gossip travels fast in the Ghost Zone.” Kitty shrugged nonchalantly. 

“The entire Ghost Zone has heard about this?! But it’s not even true!! You have to tell them it isn’t true!” What the fuck, all the ghosts knew about today now?! Did Paulina secretly have a ghost counterpart in the Ghost Zone? Was Sam in the Twilight Zone? What the fuck was happening today?!

“Nah, it’s fine. They definitely don’t want to sneak in on anything.” Sam raised an eyebrow at the comment. “Also holler if you need tips or anything. I know my Johnny sure likes it when I top sometimes. The trick is to move your hips like-”

“La la la I don’t want to hear this!” Sam covered her ears and looked back at the ghost. “Do I need to stuff you in the thermos or not?” She popped her hip and held up the thermos. 

“Don’t be so dramatic! I just want to help. Johnny and I love helping couples! He went to find your boyfriend a few minutes ago, actually. Trust me, Johnny knows what he’s doing. He’ll teach Danny how to do it right.” 

Sam choked on her spit at that comment. “What?! Oh god, this day needs to be over already. What the fuck is happening?” She let out a long groan. 

“Okay, I don’t need a preview or anything. Just let me know if you need tips. By the way, you definitely should listen to that lady. Always use protection. I never really know when Johnny’s feeling extra...glowy that day.” Kitty zoomed off before Sam could change her mind about putting her in the thermos. 

_Glowy? What the-?_

_Oh. Oh god. Ghosts...must glow when they...did that mean that when Danny would…that he...does he think of her ever when he...?_

Sam’s face burned scarlett again. _STOP THINKING ABOUT DANNY LIKE THAT!_

She leaned against the wall, sliding down to the floor. Letting out a sigh, she blew her bangs out of her face. The girls’ comments kept swirling through her head. And now the ghosts are all in on it too?! She wasn’t sleeping with Danny! _“But you’d like to. Someday.”_ She growled at Valerie’s words. It wasn’t like she hadn’t thought about it before, she just always squashed those thoughts immediately. They were still in high school for fucksake! And they weren’t even together! 

For a split second, Sam let her mind wander; the thought of getting that intimate with _anyone_ was terrifying, but she always felt safe and secure with Danny. She was closer to him than anyone else in her life anyways, just not, you know…. _physically_. Only a little bit.

_Oh God, stop going there._ She felt her face heating up again, so she climbed up from her spot on the floor and went into the bathroom to splash some cold water on her face and calm down. 

This whole thing was stupid, anyways. Sure, she liked Danny. A lot. But that didn’t mean anything would happen between them. Just because they kissed a few times didn’t mean that Danny liked her. As far as she knew, he still liked Paulina and probably still Valerie to an extent. She frowned. She would never understand what guys saw in Paulina. 

She dried her face off with a paper towel and stared at herself in the mirror. Danny would never see her in any way other than a friend or a sister. And high schoolers are just dumb. Hormones ran wild, as expected with teenagers, and everyone always talked about doing things, but aside from the whole debacle that got the school to have a sex education day in the first place, she highly doubted anyone was doing anything beyond second base. Everyone was just so immature. Guys and girls can be best friends and have sleepovers and find each other attractive without it being weird. But what if she and Danny did have something more than friendship?

She facepalmed. Nothing would ever happen. If anything were to happen, Danny would have made a move by now. _Don’t get your hopes up_. People were just stupid and trying to tease her. She knew she had to just not give a shit about what other people say or think like she always did. Once she convinced herself that she was calm and everything was normal (ghosts aside), she rounded the corner and left the bathroom feeling more confident. Until she ran into someone. 

Sam was so flustered from previous events and was walking with so much momentum, she didn’t notice Danny walking out of the boys’ bathroom at the same time she was leaving the girls’. And because he was taller (and clumsier) than she was, he knocked them both to the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was written by yours truly, and that's kind of the pattern for this fic. Nick writes the boys' perspectives and I write the girls', then we join forces on the chapters where they're all mixed together. 
> 
> If there's anything you want to see in upcoming chapters, let us know! Hope you enjoyed this one!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is fully co-written. It's a short chapter, but I think you'll enjoy anyway! Updates may be coming a bit slower now, as we haven't fully completed the story yet. That being said, give us your feedback! Your ideas may end up being used. Enjoy!

Sam stared up at Danny, whose face was mere centimeters away from hers, processing the situation. He was laying on top of her, in a position that would only fuel those rumors that they were sleeping together. Though it made her fantasy of Danny hovering over her like that in a much different setting and situation than the school hallway not seem so far-fetched anymore, her eyes widened and she quickly tried to sit up without warning and ended up head butting Danny in the face. He let out a small yelp and Sam leaned back down and looked up at him clutching his nose. She rubbed her head where it collided with his face. “Ow, that hurt,” she muttered. 

Danny pulled his hand away from his nose, glancing at the blood on his fingers, and gave her a look. She wasn’t the one who was bleeding! 

“Shit, Danny, I’m so sorry!” She gently lifted a hand towards his face, internally debating if trying to help would make it better or worse. “Are you okay?” He opened his mouth to retort, but she cut him off. “Sorry, standard question.” He must have caught on to what she was going to say, because he said the same thing at the exact same time she did. He shot her a small smirk. She didn’t know if she should be flattered or freaked that he knew her that well. She’d have to start being more unpredictable again.

They kept staring at each other intensely until they remembered that he was basically straddling her in the middle of the school hallway and if anyone caught them, they’d be in a worse situation than they already appeared to be in with all the gossip that was sure to spread from the girls in class. It sure wasn’t helping her imagination squash any thoughts of those rumors one day becoming true, as slim of a chance that may be.

“Uh…” Danny’s eyes widened and he quickly scrambled off of her, standing up and smoothing his shirt out.

Sam grabbed the hand Danny offered as he helped her up off the floor. Balancing on her feet once again, she rubbed her arm awkwardly. “So um, how’s it going in there?” She pointed her thumb back towards the classroom door. She could barely look at him. She lowered her eyes from his face before realizing that she was accidentally staring at where his….banana….was, a fresh blush covering her face once again. She snapped her eyes back up and stared at a poster behind him instead. 

“Terrible. How about you?” He wiped the blood from his nose.

“I’m scarred for life. And it’s not even about the actual lecture.” 

“What do you mean?” He tilted his head in curiosity. She hated when he did that. It was so cute. Damn him. 

“I uh...look, let’s just say I’m trying to handle it, but I’m sorry if you start hearing rumors that we’re...you know, doing the do?” She closed her eyes and sighed at how stupid this whole day was. 

“What?” Danny’s attention was immediately grabbed at this odd rumor. He couldn’t help but blurt out, “Is it like, true?”

“NO!” Sam almost shouted. “It’s not true! I think you would know!”

“She’s lying,” a sing-song tone echoed in the hallways, almost hauntingly. 

They snapped to see Elliot standing by the guys’ bathroom, keeping it propped open to have avoided the creaking giving him away. Sam’s eyes grew wide.

“Elliot, you fucking-how long have you been there!?” Danny snapped. Elliot simply shrugged, letting the door to the bathroom swing shut. He held up his phone, waving it a bit as he stepped backwards a bit towards the classroom.

“Long enough to get some nice, juicy news to text Paulina,” he told them. “You guys are so brazen, I’m almost jealous.”

Sam dashed a few steps before being stopped by Danny’s arm. Elliot’s eyes widened in fear, and he immediately hauled ass into the classroom. Sam debated going into the classroom and making a scene. She stood, fuming before glancing back at Danny. He was holding his nose with his other hand, and she huffed before going into the girl’s bathroom, coming back with some paper towels to hand to him. 

“Lean forward,” she instructed him. Danny accepted the paper towels as she grabbed the back of his head, forcing him to tilt his head towards her. “Is it still bleeding?”

“Yeah, I can feel it still going. You’ve got a strong head,” Danny joked. Sam rolled her eyes. 

“I need it, I’m the only one on this team with any brains. Besides maybe Jazz,” Sam pointed out. She began to absentmindedly stroke his hair. Danny sighed, glancing over at Sam before freezing. Too perfect of a line of vision, and with her hand in his hair...This was not a good predicament to be in. 

“Yeah, uh, but she loves Harvard,” he cleared his throat a bit anxiously. He tried to raise his head up to try and somehow look Sam in the eye. “She recently got a boyfriend. Nice dude, nothing like Johnny 13.”

“Keep your head down, it’ll stop faster,” Sam scolded him. Her palm pressed down, forcing him to continue keeping his head tilted. Danny tried to find something fascinating on the floor to look at. “I didn’t know that though. She didn’t tell me last time we FaceTimed, is it really new?”

“You guys FaceTime?” Danny questioned, trying to move his head up again, only to be forced to keep the pleasantly unfortunate view.  _ For the love of god, Sam. Let  _ **_me_ ** _ look at you in the  _ **_face_ ** _. _ Sam shrugged, but all it did was cause a small jiggle, and Danny began to feel a slight panic. Unwanted boner activity was beginning to stir in his pants. Oh god, not now. 

“Of course, you’re not my only Fenton friend,” Sam lightly joked, but frowned. “Is it still bleeding?”

“Yes!” Danny lightly snapped as desperation was sinking in. Stare at the floor. Stare at the floor. Wait why the hell would he stare at the floor when there was a dream sight right in front of him?

“It shouldn’t be,” she mused lightly, but she let him fully lift his head. The panic wasn’t going away. Neither was the blood that was now rushing instead to his other head. _ That’s  _ why you stare at the floor. Stupid, stupid. “Can I see?”

Danny silently moved the paper towels, and a small droplet of blood immediately leaked out. Sam took one of the papers from his hand, refolding it to a clean area. She licked it before grabbing his jaw and beginning to wipe away some of the blood. Danny stood still as a statue. The light, careful touches of her cleaning up was not helping anything. Were her hands always this soft? He figured they’d feel-NO. He had to look like a sweaty mess. He felt like a sweaty mess. If he stuck around any longer, he was sure Sam would notice his growing bulge, and he sure as fuck did not need that to happen. 

“It’s better,” she insisted to him. “It just looks a bit messy.” She jumped a bit when he grabbed the paper towel from her.

“Yeah, good point,” he said quickly. “I’m going to go clean up in the bathroom.” Sam stared at him.

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, good idea,” she agreed. “I’ll see you at lunch, okay? Be careful.”

“I will,” Danny promised, and he immediately turned and pushed the swinging door into the bathroom. Sam watched him before going back into the girls’ restroom and tossing the paper towel that was left behind in the trash.


	5. Chapter 5

God it felt like forever until he was finally leaving the bathroom again, even though the clock on the wall said it had only been about five minutes. He waited for Sam to leave and for his personal issues to figure themselves out before he swung the bathroom door open. Thankfully, nobody was there, and he sighed heavily. He was _not_ looking forward to returning to the class. Maybe he should just skip.

Ugh, and risk having to do a one on one private sex education lesson with Mr. Lancer? No thanks. He’d rather get the talk from the Box Ghost. 

He dragged his feet towards the classroom. Elliot was obviously back in the class by now, probably already telling everybody what had just happened. Which was nothing, but once he spread the news to Paulina, that was all she wrote. Paulina could spread gossip so fast that it was honestly impressive. Almost a superpower. 

Danny stood in the doorframe of the class before immediately turning to leave. Fuck this.

“Hey!” Mike’s voice called out accusingly. “Come on. Can’t skip out.” God, why couldn’t the accident have fully killed him? Ghosts didn’t have to go to school. Or suffer through having to listen to the sex talk. 

Taking a deep breath, he turned to see the bane of his existence. Elliot, grinning like the cat that ate the canary, was sitting in the previously unoccupied seat that was to Danny’s left. That absolute fucker changed seats _again_ , and Danny avoided eye contact as he returned to his chair. Elliot watched him like a hawk. 

No sooner than he planted himself, Elliot scooted his chair closer to him. Danny refused to look at him. The other leaned into him.

“Couldn’t wait, aye?” he whispered, not even bothering to hold back a snicker. 

Danny’s eyes flickered to the front. Mike’s attention was on a student who had asked a question. He took the chance to punch Elliot in the shoulder. Hard. The exchange student’s seat jerked back a bit, and he winced as he rubbed his shoulder. Danny hoped it would bruise. Tucker nudged Danny, giving him a weird look. Danny shook his head, and he rubbed his face with his hands tiredly. He knew his face was bright red. 

“You know, girls with more experience tend to give you a better time,” Elliot’s voice refused to shut the fuck up. “So uh, ya know. You’re welcome.”

“For what?” Danny scowled. 

“Dude, Sam and I have done stuff. We’d go to her house and such, I’ve been to third base like, at least four times.”

Danny felt his hands shake with rage. God damn it, god _fucking damn it._ He knew that wasn’t true. He was there on every date, from beginning to end because he specifically didn’t trust him. And even when he stopped, Tucker was there. Nothing happened. He knew it. But how do you call a guy out like that? How do you prove that you know he’s full of shit?

“You’re full of shit,” was all Danny could find himself able to say. “And just shut the hell up about Sam already. You guys broke up. It’s over. Done. Let it go.”

Elliot gave a small hum.

“Eh, I dunno. I thought about asking her out again,” Elliot said slyly. 

Danny took a deep breath. He refused to fall into this guy’s petty crap. No, no, he wasn’t, he was just trying to test his patience. _He’s just trying to get a reaction out of you, Fenton. Don’t give him one._

He made a point of ignoring Elliot, instead opening the Planned Parenthood booklet to the section related to Mike’s lecture. He zoned out though. None of this mattered, he wasn’t an idiot. Condoms and consent, basic stuff. Not like he planned on going out and getting wild. 

Well of course, there were some girls he wouldn’t mind getting wild with. Paulina instantly came to mind. She had an excellent body. One he had seen in a swimsuit before. And of course, it’s not like he didn’t think about it with Valerie when they were together. He liked her a lot. Plus Sam. Sam had such a nice gentle touch. And soft lips and hands. Why did he never realize that?

Danny spaced out, staring ahead at the front of the class. He wished Sam was here, next to him instead of fucking Elliot. By now, she’d likely have leaned into him, bored to tears herself. Sometimes she cuddled up into him if it was cold. It wasn’t now, but it wouldn’t be the first time he purposefully made the classroom a bit chilly for that very reason. Her hugs were always just comforting and calming. 

“Dude, taste this,” Tucker’s voice broke him from his thoughts. Danny glanced to see his friend. He had opened another condom packet, and he was holding it up to Danny. 

“...What?” 

“Dude, it tastes really good,” Tucker insisted. “It tastes just like mint.”

“I’m not licking any condoms that you’ve already been licking,” Danny scowled. 

“Just open yours and taste it,” Tucker encouraged. Danny sighed, giving a light shrug. Well, anything to pass the time. 

He opened the condom packet. It was greasy and felt gross, and he hesitantly pressed his tongue against it. Surprisingly, Tucker was right. Not too bad.

“Huh, that does taste like mint,” he hummed in surprise. 

He put the entire, still rolled condom in his mouth. He sucked on it for a bit before spitting it back out into his hand. Danny studied Mike until Mike turned his back and Lancer was still distracted before slapping it on Elliot’s cheek. The wet condom stuck there for a second before falling to the floor. Elliot immediately turned to glare at him. He glanced to make sure the teachers were still distracted before returning the punch from earlier, hitting Danny in the upper arm. 

Danny flinched. It definitely didn’t hurt nearly as much as a ghost, but it still ached for a moment. He refused to rub his shoulder to comfort himself. This was apparently a bad move. Elliot glared at him until the next available opportunity, and he hit him again. Danny let out an irritated groan from clenched teeth. That one hurt a bit more.

“Cut it out before I kick you so hard you can be assured that you’ll never have a kid,” Danny threatened. 

“Bold of you to even assume I want children, Fenton,” Elliot replied in a hushed tone. “The best birth control is having a one year old nephew that screams all the time and constantly shits himself out of excitement whenever he hears the ice cream truck. No fucking thanks. From the looks of things, you’re the one that needs to be neutered. I can gladly help.”

Elliot shifted a bit away from him, only to raise his foot to attempt to kick him. Obviously, he only hit Danny’s side. The halfa grabbed Elliot’s foot, yanking him hard. He fell out of the seat with a surprised yelp. 

“You guys okay?” Mike’s voice called out. Upon hearing the noises, Mr. Lancer had snapped to his feet.

“You two better not be messing around,” Mr. Lancer’s voice instantly caused a wave of complete silence to fall upon the classroom. “This is an important lesson you will carry for the rest of your lives. I expect you to pay attention, or else I will assign homework or give a pop quiz on this.”

Elliot put his elbow up on the table, pulling himself up and back onto his seat. 

“I’m fine, just tilted my chair back too much,” he lied. He flashed Lancer a fake smile. The teacher didn’t look amused.

“Watch yourself, Mr. Gregor,” he warned before sitting back down. 

Mike gave a friendly smile at the class before continuing his conversation. Danny sat up a bit straighter. Of all the days to get detention, this was not the day he wanted to have to deal with that. Sure, he wasn’t on the radar now, but it wouldn’t be long. 

He felt Elliot nudge him, and he pointedly ignored it. He focused on Mike, who was answering Kwan’s inquiry about a male birth control pill. Elliot poked him. Danny did nothing.

“Hey, you mad just because I know that Sam wears pink panties?” Elliot whispered. That was enough to instantly boil his blood.

“You don’t know shit,” Danny hissed at him. 

“Oh I know all about how Sam secretly has bright pink panties,” Elliot taunted. Danny rolled his eyes. He had done Sam’s laundry before. He’s done her emergency overnight packing. They’ve gotten a bit heavy during makeouts twice. She’s stayed over for sleepovers since they were like twelve. And even if none of that happened, he doubted Sam would secretly wear pink. She didn’t care what others thought, if she wanted to wear pink, she’d just openly wear pink.

“You’re so full of crap,” Danny scowled. “They’re almost all black or purple. At least one’s dark gray with black bats all over them. You really think Sam would wear pink like, ever? Dumbass.”

Elliot stared at him, mouth slightly open. Tucker was staring at him too, with wide eyes. Danny didn’t really notice them, focusing his attention once more on Mike. He had, at some point, began writing a list of pros and cons up on the board of various birth control methods. Danny studied it for a moment. Mike glanced at the clock. He patted the box set before him on the table.

“Okay, so we’re approaching lunch, so I’m going to take a pause right now to just say that this box has some condoms, sample-size lube bottles, and some short books about gender identity that you can take as you wish,” Mike explained, holding up the items as he spoke. “There’s just some fun stickers too, and we also have a card that has the number of a therapist office we partner with. We’ll be leaving the door unlocked, so you can come in and grab it discreetly during lunch if you don’t want to in the rush to leave. I won’t be in here, I’ll actually be with Mallory in Room 105, which I understand is the uh.” Mike paused. “Room just down the hall?” The class nodded at him. “Cool. So we’ll be there if you want to ask more personal questions.”

The bell finally rang, and Danny sighed in relief. Elliot was already out of his seat, mumbling something about needing to update Paulina asap on something, out the door before Mike could even continue.

“Alrighty folks, if you wanna take some bananas with you as part of lunch too, feel free!” Mike shot a teasing smile at Danny, and the teen sunk in his seat before quickly getting to his feet and making a fast-walk for the door. “We won’t be needing them later on, so take as many as you like. And of course, feel free to take whatever you want from the box.”

As he passed by, Danny glanced into the box, a blurred colorful assortment of condoms, stickers and the sample lube bottles. He refused to stop and take one, unlike a few brave souls behind him, including Tucker for some reason, who stopped to grab anywhere from one, to a handful. Or in Tucker’s case, _two_ handfuls? What? Tucker wasn’t even dating anybody right now.

He quickly turned the corner out of the classroom, and a quick glance around, he noticed he was alone. He turned invisible, and he walked back in, intangibly going through his classmates to peak into the box. Danny paused before looking around as the contents were shifted as classmates hunted for what they wanted, and finally, he grabbed two purple colored condoms, Sam’s secret favorite color. She liked to act like it was black, but he knew deep down that it was purple. He walked out, seeing the hallway become crowded, though everybody seemed wrapped up in their own business. The normal.

The halfa slipped into a janitor’s closet, turning visible. He quickly left and shut the door behind him, walking until he spied his friend. Tucker was crouched on the floor next to the lockers near the classroom they had just exited, trying to carefully put his new condom collection into his open backpack without spilling them all over the floor.

“Do you really need that many?” Danny wondered. Tucker grinned. 

“Better safe than sorry!” he told him.

“What about when you get all your tech back, it’s not gonna all fit,” Danny pointed out. Tucker gave Danny an intense, serious look. 

“I’ll find a way,” he assured him before returning to his task. He was picking up fallen condoms to stuff into his bag. 

Danny chuckled. He glanced up and into the classroom, unintentionally locking eyes with Elliot. The other was talking with Mike. About what, Danny couldn’t tell, but Elliot had immediately shot him a light smirk. Danny scowled back, crossing his arms.

“Come on, Tuck, I’m starving, and I’m not really interested in having a condom for lunch,” Danny spoke up. _And I miss Sam._ He turned to begin walking, hearing Tucker scrambling to zip his backpack newly full of condoms and rush after him.

“So uh...do you wanna talk about how come you know what kind of underwear Sam wears?” Tucker questioned. Danny stared blankly at him before he flushed, scowling. 

“Tucker, you’ve seen her underwear. You did her laundry and helped me pack her stuff before.” 

Tucker blinked, thinking on this answer for a moment. Danny stood on his tiptoes, looking for a sign of Sam coming from the other classroom. None. She was probably at her locker, and he began to walk towards it, Tucker following.

“...Yeah but I’ve never like...kept track of the colors,” Tucker said slowly. Danny could feel his cheeks turning a bit redder, but he refused to reply. “Sooo...wanna expand a little on those three makeout times that I apparently didn’t know about?”

“No,” Danny said shortly before finally spotting Sam. He sighed happily, taking a few eager steps towards her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally an update, because like everyone else in 2020, we are doing our best! This one was written by Nick.


	6. Chapter 6

She leaned her back against the sink and let out a breath that pushed her bangs out of her face for a moment. Danny had been  _ so close _ to her. She closed her eyes and could picture his face being so close to hers, his body pressed against her. She sighed contentedly and decided to allow herself a moment of weakness. She imagined what it would be like if they were dating, if they actually were intimate with each other like everyone assumed. She pictured Danny caressing her face and leaving kisses down her neck and along her collarbone. She even tried to imagine Danny wanted her too. He’d have his hands all over her, along the bare part of her torso, no curve left undiscovered. His hands would move to her upper thigh, squeezing momentarily until they moved higher to…

She let out a minuscule moan which echoed slightly in the empty bathroom and startled her. She stood there shocked for a few seconds before groaning. “Stop it stop it stop it!” She turned around and looked at herself in the mirror. “Pull yourself together, you’re better than this.” 

She took a deep breath and psyched herself up once more. “You’re cool. Danny’s just your friend whether you like it or not. This is all fine. It’s just the other kids and Kitty who are working you up like this,” she muttered quietly to herself as she sauntered back over to the classroom.

She opened the door and instantly regretted it as every pair of eyes in the room looked towards her. “Miss Manson, is everything alright?” Mrs. Tetslaff looked up from her desk.

“Y-yeah everything is fine.” Sam felt the more she told herself this, the more it would become true. 

“Fantastic. No more interruptions like that.” The teacher went back to her crossword puzzle as if nothing had happened. Sam walked back to her seat and sat down, eyeing the banana with the condom on it suspiciously. Stupid high school. She pushed it to the corner of her desk where it wouldn’t be staring right in her face. 

“Now that we’ve covered things leading up to sex, like consent, condoms, and birth control, we will briefly go over what qualifies as sex. There are a few different types,” Mallory started up again. 

Paulina turned towards Sam and snickered, “Elliot caught you and Danny having a quickie in the hallway, how  _ scandalous _ !” She held her phone up and waved it in the air.

“What?!” Sam squeaked. Mrs. Tetsflaff sent her a glare until she sunk in her seat again. “That’s not true, I just ran into him in the hallway!” She hastily whispered once the teacher’s attention was no longer on her. 

“You can’t deny it. Elliot sent me a picture.” 

“Ugh gross. What? But nothing happened! How did you get your phone back anyways? I saw you turn it in earlier.” Sam crossed her arms over her chest. Maybe she could bust Paulina. Not that an A-lister breaking the rules would ever garner attention, or rather detention. Sam groaned internally. That would never work. Plus, Paulina apparently had a compromising picture she could easily use as blackmail. 

“Please,” Paulina stuffed her phone back into her bra, “like I don’t keep one on me at all times. This is my burner phone where Elliott gives me all the gossip.” Sam narrowed her eyes. So  _ that’s _ what Paulina was doing with her backpack earlier. Secretly texting the jerkface. Paulina and Elliot managed to sneak extra phones in? She wondered if Tucker would be pissed or impressed. Pissed, because he had to turn in all of his devices. Impressed, because Paulina had more than one phone and he would think she had tech-nerd potential. Sam snorted to herself. 

“I’m surprised you still have room in there,” Sam retorted.

“Ladies, please. There are a few more topics we need to cover before lunch.” Mallory interrupted the conversation before Paulina could scold Sam. “Now, as I was saying, there are different types of sex: oral, anal, and vaginal. Whichever option you choose, it is important to use protection and other tools such as lube to both protect you and your partner and to have the best experience. Remember that consent is important! Please open your informational packets to page six and we’ll get the worst part over with.” 

Sam rolled her eyes; as if the “worst part” hadn’t happened to her fifteen times over already. She jumped a bit when one of Paulina’s long and sharp nails jabbed her in the arm and sent the girl a death glare. She opened her mouth and was about to let the Latina girl have it, but Paulina held up her phone once more, showing Sam the picture on her phone. It certainly did not look like they had only literally ran into each other and fell down. Stupid Elliot. Stupid Paulina. Stupid day. Sam wanted nothing more than for this day to be over and for everyone to go back to their typical method of ignoring her existence. She scoffed and turned the page in her packet, bracing herself.

The instructor read through the packet’s section on the actual act of sex, several girls shifting uncomfortably in their seats, the rest tuning the whole thing out. “Sam clearly already knows so much about this. Maybe you and Danny should be teaching the class.” Sam rolled her eyes, stretched her leg out, and kicked her cousin’s shin for that comment. 

“For the last time, Danny and I are just friends and are going to stay that way. Nothing is going on between us, we aren’t dating, he’s not my boyfriend. I don’t even have a boyfriend. I don’t know how else I can dumb it down enough for you guys to understand,” Sam said bitterly. 

“I don’t know why you’re denying it,” Paulina started, “it’s  _ so _ obvious you love him.”

“Yeah, you really just need to admit that to yourself, Sam. It’ll make your life a lot easier,” Valerie chimed in. 

“Just admit it, you like him and totally want to see him naked. We all know you do.” Star twisted her hair around her finger boredly. 

“I do not!” Sam protested. 

“Maybe we’ll leave you alone if you do.” Sam didn’t trust her cousin for one second, but with all of the girls staring her down, she decided to take her chances in hopes that they would hold up their end of the bargain.

She sighed and played with her bracelet nervously. “Alright, fine...maybe I do like him. But it’s certainly not any of  _ your _ business, and if  _ any _ of you  _ ever _ tell Danny or  _ anyone _ else about  _ any _ of the things said today, I will put your decapitated head on a spike and stick it in front of the school as a warning not to cross me and then use your remaining body parts as human compost. At least then you’d be contributing to society in some way.” Sam looked up and saw several of the girls staring at her; she smirked at the ones who looked absolutely repulsed at her threat. 

“Finally!” Valerie groaned. “You admitted it out loud. Now let’s all just get through these next fifteen minutes until we get a break for lunch. You guys are making this a lot longer and more painful to sit through. I have much better things to do than try to keep this civil.”

The girls all turned towards the instructor once more, with the exception of Star and Paulina, who had moved on to another piece of Casper High gossip. Sam breathed out a sigh of relief and looked to see what Mallory was up to now. She eyed the few items placed on the desk in the front of the room. What the heck was the Fenton Ecto Lipstick Laser doing here? She glanced up at the instructor again and decided that maybe now was a good time to pay attention. “...toys that can be used during sex or masturbation, like this one here.” Sam blushed as Mallory held up what Sam had assumed was a Fenton gadget, knowing she had thought very,  _ very _ wrong. She would never be able to use that weapon ever again. Did the Fentons know that their gadgets looked so inappropriate?! Shit, and she had quite a few of them inside her locker too. As much as she loved seeing her mom burst all the little veins in her head, if her mom got any little ideas in her head, Sam would probably end up in some French boarding school with no way to contact the outside world. 

Sam shook her head and looked at Mallory pointing to a messy diagram on the board. “And this here is the clitoris, and it’s sole purpose is for you to feel pleasure. It actually has several thousands of nerve endings in it! Isn’t that fascinating?!” Mallory looked eagerly at the high school students, actually peaking some interest now. Sam looked over at Tetslaff, who had set her puzzle down and suddenly seemed interested. Damn. For Tetslaff to actually be paying attention, this part must be super important. 

Mallory went into a few more details. “So, stimulating it will give you more pleasure regardless of what else is going on. Any questions?” Several hands shot up in the air, including one from Tetslaff. Gross. “Excellent! You first.” Mallory beamed as she turned to Tetslaff. 

Oh no no. Sam was definitely tuning this part out. She started paging through the booklet again. It’s not that she wasn’t mature about the whole thing - she was actually learning some stuff - but she did NOT need to think about one of her teachers having sex. 

Were the guys learning this stuff too? Was Lancer being as active as Tetslaff? Sam shivered. Didn’t need to go there. 

She looked down at the booklet and pulled it closer to herself so no one would notice. She peeked at the diagram of the male anatomy before quickly looking away. She didn’t entirely see the appeal, but it was probably different when it was inside of you. She lightly blushed. She could do this. She’s mature. No one should know she’s fazed by this. Goth indifference. Maturity. She can handle this. 

Sam looked up when she felt someone’s eyes on her, spotting Valerie with a slight smirk on her face. 

“Taking notes, Manson?” Valerie laughed. 

Sam responded with her middle finger. “Not. A. Word.” Her response just made Valerie laugh even harder. Sam smiled; she liked being friends with Valerie. 

Speaking of friends, how were Tucker and Danny handling this? She figured Tucker would be the worst off, although Danny really never understood where babies came from until 8th grade. Sam laughed to herself at that.  _ Boys _ . 

“ _ My _ Phantom would wear briefs for sure!” Paulina bragged, grabbing Sam’s attention once more. 

“No, he’s definitely a boxers guy,” Star said sternly while brushing her fingers through her hair.

“I don’t know, I’m kinda with Pauli on this one,” Lauren spoke up, “his suit is so tight.” 

“Oh!” Paulina gasped and clapped her hands together, “Phantom goes commando!” A few other girls joined in her squealing. “Now I know that when the ghost boy comes to rescue me, I won’t have to work very hard so we can share our first time together!” Paulina’s eyes shined as she started daydreaming. She was subconsciously squeezing her breasts together. Ugh. “I can’t believe the ghost boy flies around naked just for me!” 

Sam slammed her hands on the desk, speaking to herself. “He wears boxer-briefs you ignorant twats!” 

Silence. She had said it with absolute certainty. 

Valerie raised her eyebrows at Sam and smirked. Paulina looked offended. “Ugh, why would the ghost boy tell you anything, freak?” 

Sam finally looked up after someone got her attention and she looked at all the other girls confused. Once realizing her internal thoughts had actually been an outburst that people heard, her face brightened to a deep scarlet. “Wh-what? I didn’t, I mean, why would I? It was just...I mean, pfft what are you guys talking about?” Sam tried to play it cool.

“Oooo she DEFINITELY knows something! Look at that blush!!” Star squealed. Paulina shot daggers at Sam. 

“No, I just...uhhhh…” Sam literally could not think of a single excuse as to why she would know what type of underwear Danny wears. She can’t exactly say she patches him up all the time or talk about all the mishaps with his pants when he was getting used to his new powers.  _ Damn, why didn’t that still happen now? NOT THE POINT.  _ “I….asked him?” 

Paulina let out a laugh, “Why would  _ you _ ever need to talk to him anyways? He doesn’t talk to losers.” 

“We’re not losers!” Sam quickly caught her mistake, “I mean, I’m not a loser, I just talk to him sometimes.” 

“Still doesn’t explain why you know what he wears. Unless,” a small gasp from Star, “unless you fucked the ghost boy too?! Does Danny know?!” 

Sam’s head made an audible thump when she slammed it against her desk, her dark hair covering her face completely. “Valerie. Help,” Sam quietly muttered into her desk. 

Fortunately, Valerie had heard it. “Uh, Sam just was writing for the fan zine on Phantom and had to ask him. You know, for the readers. Journalism and stuff,” Valerie tried.

Sam let out a sigh of relief. 

“Oh, I can’t believe this! Sam is cheating on  _ my _ Phantom with Danny!” Paulina growled, “I’m going to tell Phantom the truth and then he’ll be all mine,” Paulina sneered. 

“Oh my fucking god, oh my  _ god _ , what is this fucking day?!” Sam picked her head up and groaned. “Paulina, I promise it’s not what you think it is.” 

“I’m not listening to a word you say, you two-timing slut!” 

“Woah, uncalled for!” Valerie sternly pointed at Paulina. “I don’t know how Sam knows Phantom, but I can guarantee you it’s none of your goddamn business. Back off!” 

Paulina glared at her former friend and pretended she wasn’t phased. “Whatever. Wait until Elliot tells her little boyfriend her secret though,” she smiled mischievously and slyly pulled her phone out from her bra and started frantically typing a message. “Even if she is a bitch, it’s still good gossip.” 

Valerie sighed and tried to calm the other girls down. Sam was trying to figure out if she was having a stroke or not. Was all of this actually happening? Did Nocturne take over again? Oh man, now she had to warn Danny that there were rumors flying around that she was having sex with both halves of him! Danny will never want to be seen with her again and...wait,  _ both halves? ...at the same time? _ She knows he can duplicate, and that could be really -

The bell ringing broke her thought process,  _ thank god.  _

“Alright ladies, grab one of the bags on the way out, go have lunch, then we will meet back in the guys’ classroom to summarize the topics covered today. Feel free to bring your bananas to lunch, just please remove the condom before eating it. We’ve had too many incidents at other schools already. See you in thirty minutes!” Mallory clapped her hands and held a box with little bags in it, making sure every girl took one as they left the classroom. 

Valerie sent Sam a gentle pat on the back for support before leaving. Sam scoffed at everything that has happened already today and gathered her things, ripping the condom off her banana and slingshotting it until it got caught in Paulina’s hair without her noticing. She smiled triumphantly and made her way to the front of the room, grabbing a bag on her way out. She walked to her locker and couldn’t help but peek inside the “goodie” bag. A large handful of condoms, a small tube of lube, a tablet of Plan B, some stickers, and more informational packets. Whoopie, she couldn’t  _ wait _ to go home and read through those. She shoved her things in her locker and smiled softly as she saw her friends approaching her. She knew they would put her in a better mood. She took a deep breath and composed herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trick or treat! ;)


	7. Chapter 7

“Hey guys,” Sam smiled warmly at her two friends as she shut her locker. “How’s it going on your end?” 

Danny didn’t look directly at her, but muttered a “hey”. 

Tucker snickered next to him. “Oh, I think Danny is having the time of his life!” Danny elbowed him in the ribs, “Ow! Hey, I even used a life or death pun for you!” 

“That bad, huh?” Sam laughed. “Can’t say I’m doing any better though. By the way, Danny, I’m going to have to...warn you about a few things. Your secret is still safe, but there’s still going to be gossip about you. Both of your halves.” Sam shut her brain down before she went back to _that_ fantasy. “Sorry, I really tried. The girls at this school are indubitably so fucking stupid, they wouldn’t know what the actual truth is, even if it bit them on the nose. Honestly, how they even made it to twelfth grade is beyond me.” 

Tucker noticed Sam getting all worked up and frowned. “Hey, the day’s almost over though!”

“Huh? Wait, what do you mean gossip?” Danny finally looked up at her. 

“Ugh, Paulina has some twisted thoughts.” Sam rubbed the sides of her head as she tried to calm down. “She’s been the biggest pain in the ass all day. Just be prepared for any gossip that Phantom flies commando, and know that I tried to stop it.” 

Danny’s eyes went wide, “why would they-?” 

Tucker busted out laughing, “You HAVE to tell me how that happened!” 

“Ugh guys, please not now.” She grabbed each of their shirts and pulled them towards the cafeteria. 

“Man, I wish I had my PDA! I hate being out of the loop!” Tucker complained. 

Sam unpeeled her banana, trying to ignore any innuendos and return to normalcy, as she listened to Tucker’s bellyaching. She took a large bite as her stomach growled. If Skulker hadn’t shown up on the way to school, she probably would have been able to actually grab some breakfast before this whole ordeal. Sure, she had a salad waiting for her, but that wasn’t going to cut it today. 

“Damn, look at Manson deep throating that banana like a pro!” Dash quirked. Danny snapped his head to look over at Sam. _Oh god. Woah...wait NO!_

Without missing a beat, Sam chucked her half eaten banana at Dash, hitting him directly in the face. She smiled proudly as Tucker chuckled next to her. 

“Nice shot, Sam!” Tucker held his hand out for a high five, which Sam returned. Dash made an attempt to take a jab at her, but Kwan stopped him. Kwan had to protect _both_ of his “best friends”, after all. 

Danny was silent, unable to comprehend his enjoyment of Dash’s misery at Sam’s behalf. _That’s my girl,_ he had thought. Ugh, why? Why did he keep coming back to this? Sam is just a friend. Dash’s dumbass comment just stirred the pot even more. Now Danny had a new fantasy about his best friend to worry about. He looked over at Sam again and blushed before quickly looking away. With the amount of times he’s blushed today, he didn’t think it was possible anymore. And what is she talking about with all these rumors?

Tucker nudged Danny with his elbow and raised an eyebrow at him as Sam caught up with Valerie and raced for the salad bar. “You okay? I thought you’d always dreamt of Sam hitting Dash in the face.” Tucker laughed to himself. “I know I certainly have.” 

“Not the only dream of Sam I have…” Danny muttered to himself. 

“What?” Tucker looked at his friend again.

“What?” Danny looked back at him confused, grabbing a tray after Tucker. 

“What was that now?” Tucker smirked as he grabbed two burgers. Terrific, Tucker had heard him after all. 

“Nothing,” Danny said sternly before grabbing some mac n cheese. 

“Uh huh.” Tucker’s smirk grew as he piled more food onto his plate. 

“It’s nothing!” Danny insisted as he grabbed the rest of his food and followed Tucker to their table.

“Alright, alright. Calm down dude.” Tucker sat down and immediately took a bite of one of his burgers. 

“Sorry,” Danny sighed. “Between dumbass number one and dumbass number two over there,” he pointed towards Elliot and Dash, “I’m not thinking straight.” 

Tucker nodded and swallowed as Danny took a sip of his drink. Tucker looked over at Sam, pursed his lips, then paused for a moment before saying, “you know, Sam is actually pretty hot, now that I think about it.” 

Danny spit his drink out across the table and started coughing. “ _What?!_ ” 

“Oh relax, I’m not gonna steal your girlfriend or anything,” Tucker rolled his eyes as Danny muttered some “she’s not my girlfriend” line. “I’m just saying. I mean, she’s super cool and fun to hang with, she looked great at the freshman dance, and she already has made mini skirt Friday an everyday kind of deal! Like if she just lost the tights or whatever, holy smokes. And like, dude, she has _boobs_. _BOOBS_. We’ve been so close this entire time!”

Danny caught his breath and scoffed at Tucker before realizing he kind of had a point. If Danny had learned anything that day, it was that he definitely had conflicting feelings about Sam. It wouldn’t surprise him if other guys started noticing her more as well. Actually, they had, if you counted dumbass number one and dumbass number two.

Danny forced out a small laugh, “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I mean, I kinda…” He trailed off before getting a nod of encouragement from Tucker, silently letting it be known that this conversation was strictly between them and would most likely never be repeated again. “I mean, she’s Sam and she’s so pretty and smart and cool and she hangs out with _us_ , like what the hell? And I ran into her in the hallway earlier after dealing with Johnny 13, and I was bleeding and stuff and her boobs were like, right there in my face while she was trying to help me and with all this dumb sex talk, I had to run to the bathroom before anything happened or became noticeable. I’ve been embarrassed more than enough for one day.” 

Tucker let out a loud laugh and slapped Danny on the back. “Damn, dude. I didn’t think you’d ever admit anything.” Danny’s hand immediately went to rub the back of his neck and his face turned crimson for the millionth time that day. “So you ran into Sam, huh?” Tucker wagged his eyebrows suggestively and laughed again when Danny threw a fry at his face. “Don’t worry, dude. I still respect the bro code. I won’t say a word. But like, excusing the fact that she’s like a sister to me for a second, what were they like?” 

Danny opened his mouth as he thought of something to say, before jerking forward after Dash slapped him on the back (hard) and took a seat next to him. “You’re talking about Manson, right? She is pretty hot. You’re a lucky man, Fenton.” 

Was Dash actually...being nice to him? Because he thought that he and Sam were actually... _doing_ _things_ _together_. What the fuck was happening today? 

“What’s she like? Really?” Dash stole one of Danny’s fries. 

“She’s definitely feisty, that’s for sure.” Elliot smirked as he sat across from Danny. This asshole again?! 

Danny made tight fists under the table. “Shut the fuck up and leave Sam alone! You guys dated for like a week! That’s nothing!” 

“It was enough to cover all of the bases, if you know what I mean. And I’m pretty sure you know what I mean.” Elliot smirked while holding up his phone with the picture on it and leaned back in the chair, nearly falling over as Danny stood quickly from the table, shaking it in the process. He was ready to pounce. 

“Shut. The fuck. Up,” Danny growled as he got all up in Elliot’s face. Elliot accepted the challenge. 

“No, I don’t think I will. But what I do think will happen is me and Sam again.” 

Dash raised an eyebrow at the two boys arguing, “What’s with this? Is Manson like, secretly a sex goddess or something? Maybe I’ll hop on that too.” 

Danny’s eyes flashed green for a brief second before almost being knocked over by Tucker, who shoved him out of the way.

“You have a phone?! How did you sneak that in? Can I please have it for five minutes? Please?!” Tucker made a grab for the phone as Elliot held it behind him. 

“Depends. What kind of dirt do you have on Danny and Sam?”

“Oh man, where do I start?”

“TUCKER!” Danny glared at his friend, not believing he was actually considering this. 

“Oh man, this I gotta hear.” Dash leaned in for a better listen. 

“Okay, one timeback in middle school, Danny-” Tucker’s sentence was muffled as Danny slapped his hand over Tucker’s mouth.

“Shut the fuck up!” Danny hissed. 

“Oh no, please go on,” Elliot smirked as he waved his phone in the air, “You may just buy yourself 2 minutes.” He tried removing Danny’s hand from Tucker’s mouth.

“Get lost, Elliot.” Danny stood from the table and stared him down again. “Tucker isn’t that desperate.” 

“Eh, I think he is,” Dash chimed in. “Foley looks like he’s about to shit a brick.” All three boys looked at Dash, just now remembering he was there. 

Across the cafeteria, Sam raised an eyebrow at the crowd around their usual table and looked back at Valerie. “Thanks again for having my back in there. I really owe you one.” 

“Nonsense. If anything, take it as repayment for how much you guys have saved my ass from ghosts. And for me trying to kill your boyfriend.” 

“He’s not my boyfriend, but thanks.” Sam grabbed a tomato from her salad bowl and popped it in her mouth. “Hey Val, do you want to sit with us?” 

Valerie grinned, “Love to, thanks. And he’s not your boyfriend _yet_. I’ll help get you there.” 

Sam laughed. “Okay, sure. We really should hang out more, you know. I need a boost of estrogen every once in a while.” 

“Yeah, I’d like that.” Valerie stopped in place for a moment, staring at the guys at their table. Sam followed where Valerie was looking and ran closer to her friends. 

“What the fuck is going on?!” Sam yelled as they approached the group of guys who were trying to tackle each other across the table. Danny and Elliot were staring each other down as Elliot held his phone as far back behind him as he could while Tucker, half on top of the table, reached for it. Dash was actually the most civil at the table. They all paused and fell silent as she spoke up. All four of them were staring at her with a weird expression on their faces. “What?” She questioned cautiously, suddenly feeling a bit self conscious. Valerie snickered to herself, taking a wild guess as to what (or who) the boys had been arguing about.

“Uh, nothing.” Danny forced Tucker back into his chair and sat back down next to him. “They were just leaving.” He glared at Elliot.

When the faux goth and the jock refused to move, Sam slammed her tray down on the table. “Get the fuck out of here before I start kicking people. I have my good boots on today.” 

Elliot was the first to make a move to leave. “Told ya, feisty.” 

Dash stood as well as he looked Sam up and down. Actually not that bad. Fortunately, Sam missed that, but Danny hadn’t. He was practically seeing red as Dash returned to his own table. 

“We’ll talk after lunch!” Tucker whispered to Elliot as he passed by on the way back to the other end of the cafeteria. 

“What was that all about?” Sam sat down and stabbed her salad with her fork before taking a bite. 

“Elliot and Dash are being shitheads and pushing all of Danny’s buttons today,” Tucker announced as he started his second burger.

“Do I wanna know?” 

“No.” Danny picked at his food, shutting down that conversation.

Valerie sat down next to Sam and across from Tucker. Noticing his fidgeting, she smirked, “Must be a tough day for you, huh? No technology of any sort?” 

Tucker groaned, “It’s killing me! It may actually kill me!” 

“Stop being so dramatic, it’s only been a few hours and we’re almost done,” Sam pointed her fork towards Tucker, “You wouldn’t believe all the shit I’ve had to go through today.” 

Danny looked up at her, “What happened? Are you okay? Did anyone say anything to you?” He glanced over towards the A Listers’ table, where everyone was passing around Elliot’s stupid phone and making crude noises and gestures towards Danny when they noticed him staring. He flushed again. 

“Chill, I’m fine. I’m just apparently the school’s gossip victim for the day.” 

“Yeah, Paulina has been pretty ruthless today,” Valerie pointed out as she started her lunch. 

“Fuck!” Sam groaned, which gave a certain part of Danny’s anatomy some life again. “I got salad dressing all over my leggings.” She started unlacing her boots. 

“W-what are you doing?” Danny squeaked.

“Taking them off. I don’t want to smell like vinaigrette for the rest of the day,” she started peeling off her leggings and with a brief hand from Valerie, she crumbled them into a ball and tossed them into her backpack before she started lacing up her boots again, careful not to lift her legs too high for anyone to accidentally see anything. 

Tucker’s eyes widened slightly, as if his conversation with Danny earlier had somehow summoned this to occur. He looked at Danny and raised an eyebrow as if proving his point. 

“Don’t even think about it,” Danny warned lowly. 

Valerie hid her smirk behind her hand as Danny gripped the table. Danny and Sam were both smitten with each other and both so, _so_ oblivious to the other person’s feelings. 

“Anyway, uh...yeah, you’re probably going to hear some gossip, just please know it’s not my fault.” Sam sighed and took another bite of her salad. “Honestly, how I have gone almost 4 years without seriously injuring Paulina is beyond me.” 

“I’ll admit, I’m a little shocked too. But you definitely wanted to deck her after she said you were cheating on Fenton with Phantom,” Valerie chuckled as Sam whipped her head towards her and sent her a menacing glare. Valerie just shrugged, knowing damn well what she was doing. Danny and Sam just needed a little nudge, and she was gonna give it to them. 

“Oh my god, WHAT?!” Tucker burst out laughing, some of his soda coming out of his nose in the process. Gross. 

Danny’s head snapped up as a light pink blush dusted his cheeks. “Uh, w-what? Paulina thinks...you and I... _and_ you and Phantom?” 

Sam groaned as she set her empty tupperware container back into her backpack. “Yes, Princess Shit-For-Brains thinks I’m intimate with both sides of you.” 

“At the same time?” Danny asked.

“Oh I don’t need to hear this!” Tucker covered his ears.

Sam kept her head down, hair covering her face, as she blushed a deep dark red. “I tried to stop it, I swear.” 

“Suuuureeee you did. I bet you hated that implication,” Tucker smirked. 

Sam managed to whack him in the back of the head from across the table, nearly giving Danny another pleasantly unfortunate view once again. 

“Hey! When I said I wished girls would hit on me, this is not what I meant!” Tucker rubbed the back of his head and readjusted his beret. 

Sam smirked. “Be careful what you wish for. Desiree can pop up at any moment.” Tucker’s eyes widened.

“Desiree?” Valerie whispered. 

“Genie ghost. Gotta be super careful around her,” Sam replied. Valerie nodded. 

“I...uh, okay...well, thanks? For...trying to stop it?” Danny said uncertainly. He had noticed in the past that when he was Phantom, his emotions definitely were stronger and he had always felt more overprotective of Sam. As Phantom, he almost seemed to have less control over his emotions. 

“No problem,” Sam muttered quietly.

“Okay, but can you please explain the “Phantom goes commando” thing?” Tucker leaned forward, placing his elbows on the table.

Danny hiccuped, and to his relief, it was his ghost sense. Oh thank god. He stood up, receiving a few looks from the other tables.

“I gotta run, I need to...basically die of embarrassment elsewhere,” Danny said slowly. Nobody seemed to think much of the phrasing. Though Tucker and Sam both immediately caught on.

“I’ll come help you not die,” Sam replied. Anything to get out of this situation. She elbowed Tucker before standing as well. “Come on, we need to help Danny not die.” Tucker waved her off, as Valerie finally understood what was happening. 

“You two lovebirds go on ahead,” he told them, “they’ve got this,” he whispered to Valerie. Danny narrowed his eyes at him.

“Don’t go around telling a bunch of our secrets,” Danny spoke with an underlying threatening tone. Tucker nodded.

“Of course. But you _are_ losing your fries,” he informed him, and the teen helped himself to the remaining fries on Danny’s plate. Danny accepted this, and he motioned for Sam to follow him. “Also…” Tucker threw a condom at Danny. Danny shot him a look and let the condom bounce off of his chest and land on the floor. Sam hastily grabbed her backpack, and they both fast-walked out of the cafeteria, earning several stares and eyebrow wags. 

Danny groaned, “Ugh, fuck me!” He was sick of this.

“Damn, well now we know who initiates it. Never pictured Fenton to be the dominant one,” Dash laughed. Danny growled and began to turn around before Sam pushed him forward and out of the cafeteria. 

“Not now. We probably have Kitty and I assume Johnny to worry about right now.” Once out of the cafeteria, Sam pulled out her wrist ray and put it on. She searched for her pocket knife in her boot, pulling out the Ecto Lipstick Laser by accident. “Ahh!” She dropped it as if it had been on fire and watched it roll down the hallway. Danny raised an eyebrow at her. “Nothing!” She quickly replied as she ran forward to grab the weapon and put it back in her boot. “It’s just the Ecto Lipstick! I swear!” She said a little too loudly. God damn the Fentons for making their inventions look like vibrators. God damn Planned Parenthood for pointing that out in the first place.

“I know?” Danny raised an eyebrow at her as they rounded a corner. “Let’s just get rid of Johnny and Kitty and hope that takes up the rest of the day.” 

“Oh, there you two are!” Speak of the fucking devils.

Danny flinched as he turned to see the ghostly pair that had been harassing them both all day. Kitty and Johnny stood together, both grinning excitedly.

“Can’t you guys just go fuck around with each other and stop fucking around with us?” Danny complained. Kitty gave a small scowl.

“We’re trying to help,” Kitty insisted. “I know Johnny already talked to you, but I’m pretty sure he left out some important stuff, like make sure you wash your hands. Clip and file your nails so that they’re not sharp or super long, make sure your hands aren’t freezing. Foreplay is very important.”

Danny wanted to die. He glanced at Sam, who seemed to mirror his emotions. Her face was red, and she wasn’t even looking at the pair, instead digging through her backpack. Likely in search of the Fenton Thermos. 

Johnny gave an amused scoff, and he waved his hand. “Nah, it’s not that important,” he replied. Kitty shot him a look that could re-kill Pariah Dark himself. Johnny instantly seemed to realize his mistake.

“Yes. It. Is,” she spoke through gritted teeth.

“I mean, we could overshadow you to show you how it’s done if you want,” Johnny suggested. 

Danny and Sam both froze, eyes wide, and turned a brilliant shade of red before spitting out objections.

“NO! Nope! Not necessary!” Danny yelled as he covered his eyes, thinking that would somehow block the mental images in his head. “I can’t...Sam...ughhh. No, gross.”

“Well don’t seem too excited now,” Sam spat sarcastically, rolling her eyes in the process.

“N-no! It’s not that I wouldn’t want...I mean you’re pretty and...I like...I mean, you...what do I mean?” Danny groaned and dragged his hands down his face.

“Oh, dude,” Johnny shook his head, “don’t go there unless you want to be sleeping on the couch.” 

“But I-” Danny started until Sam slapped a hand over his mouth.

“Chill out, Romeo. Now is not the time to remove your foot from your mouth.” She removed her hand before Danny licked it. That was something Danny and Tucker did. Ugh, _boys_.

“Nice touch ditching the tights though. You definitely had boys’ heads turning...even a few girls’.” Kitty tried to get them back on track.

“Uh, what?” Sam looked down at her legs. 

“Yeah, even that big blonde sporty kid was saying some pretty graphic things about you,” Johnny added.

“WHAT?!” Danny snapped his head back towards the cafeteria. 

“Oh that hit a nerve! Jealousy works, you know. That’s how I keep bringing Kitten back to me,” Johnny grinned.

Kitty rolled her eyes, “Yes, that is exactly what happens.” Her sarcasm was almost as good as Sam’s.

Danny completely ignored the ghosts bickering, focusing his attention on Sam. “Did you hear that? _DASH_ was talking about you like that! I’m gonna kill him…” He trailed off as he made a fist and looked back towards the cafeteria. 

“Danny, chill. It’s not a big deal. Dash isn’t into me because I spilled salad dressing on my tights,” Sam rolled her eyes and set her hand on Danny’s shoulder to bring him back down to Earth. 

Danny swapped his attention back to her. “Uh, no...look, I mean, you’re very attractive and you’re only wearing a crop top and a mini skirt, it’s an easy step away from imagining you naked.” Sam raised an eyebrow as she put a hand on her hip. “N-not that I am imagining that, and not that I wouldn’t want to! I mean of course I’d want to, it’s just - you’re just….I’m going to stop talking now.” He glanced down at the floor and hoped he could somehow dig himself out of this pit that he just kept digging deeper for himself.

Sam pressed her lips together, both amused and flattered with only a hint of embarrassment, “You think I’m very attractive?” 

“And he wants to see you naked,” Johnny added. 

Danny’s eyes widened before he snatched the thermos from Sam’s hand, his face burning. “Alright that’s enough of you two!” He promptly sucked them into the thermos, spitefully shaking it a bit before putting it into his locker. “They can sit there the whole weekend for all I care.” 

“Do you though? Think I’m attractive?” Sam asked shyly. “I feel like you and Tucker just see me as one of the boys and that’s how everyone sees me. I’m not cute like Paulina and Star.” She saw the panicky look on his face and smiled a bit, “I’m not going to hurt you if you answer this one. You have a free pass.” 

Danny looked like he was having an internal debate in his head about whether or not she was telling the truth about letting him off the hook, but when he looked into her eyes, he knew she really wanted an answer. He never would have guessed that Sam was a bit insecure. He gulped before rubbing the back of his neck.

“Uh…” Was he really about to admit this? Out loud? To himself? To _her_?! He couldn’t help it, she was giving him a free pass. He started at her pale legs and trailed his eyes up her body to her perfect hips, pausing at her breasts for a few half seconds longer than he probably should have, and finally setting on her face. “Yes,” he choked out, his voice husky, “very much so.” 

Sam relaxed a bit at his answer, feeling relieved. She smiled softly as she approved of his answer, and then that smile became quite sinister. “And you want to see me naked?” 

Danny was a deer in the headlights, opening his mouth to speak before deciding against it. He couldn’t tell if this was still part of the free pass or if she was just fucking with him now. He was mostly sure it was the latter. He grabbed her hand and yanked her down the hallway towards the classroom. “Yeah okay, don’t wanna be late for that sex ed class!” 

Sam laughed heartily as he hastily fast walked them from one personal hell to another. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this co-written chapter! :)


End file.
